Fat Girl Dives In

Living in the present

2012-01-27T09:04:00.002-05:00

I'm extra guilty of the things discussed in this great post my trainer wrote.

My first week on my contract job in the burbs is coming to a close and except for an extremely hungover start to yesterday, it's been great! I feel confident I can do a great job here and really make a big difference on this project.

The bad news is I haven't worked out all week. I have to get up at at 5 to be here by 7 and that took it's toll on me all week. Today I feel like I'm in the swing of this and next week will be a little easier. Saturday is my trainers class and that will help get me going again!

Food has been a bit of a challenge with no refrigerator but the cafeteria is great...I had a salmon salad 2 days in a row cooked on the grill right in front of me...it even had nutritional information with it. Snacking is not as easy as you are expected to go to the cafeteria to eat anything (even if you bring it from home) but I have had a few snacks at my desk ;)

This is a boring post so I'm glad I posted an interesting article.

Accountability

2012-01-11T13:42:00.002-05:00

Now that my self proclaimed "year of discovery" has come to an end and the "putting it all into action" year has started, I think I've finally narrowed it to what really works for me. That thing is accountability.

I've got that more than covered in the exercise department with my trainer, my yoga instructor who both make me look forward to seeing them AND getting a great workout. I'm still finding it challenging to fit in as much cardio as I need to.

Food wise, I'm back to basics and back to Weight Watchers. I find that having that meeting in the back of my mind keeps me honest all week and damn I love that sticker! I was laughing about the sticker thing with my trainer and she said "girls just like stickers". I'm already spending a small fortune on my adventures in fitness.

Now that I finally get all settled in my new routine, there's a HUGE wrench thrown in. I'm starting a 4 week consulting job. Onsite at the client. Back out in the burbs. For anyone reading who doesn't know, I worked in the suburbs of Atlanta (I live in the city) for 7 years. 50 miles a day round trip. 1 hour each way on a good day, 2 on a bad one. It almost killed me until I started working for myself and was finally able to establish a workout routine.

I'm so excited about this job and I know I will do what it takes to fit it all in. I'm just a little nervous about eating right and exercising while commuting again. Oh and did I mention I'll be up at 5am? I will use my mad planning and organization skillz to make sure I have all my food and workout gear. I'm really hoping they have a kick-ass gym I can use. It's a pretty fancy building and I'll have my badge so fingers crossed. It would be so much easier to workout before sitting in traffic for an hour. The ONLY good thing about the burbs is I can finally use my Costco membership!

So here's to accountability and constant change. I guess that makes my blog slightly more interesting!

Gravity

2012-01-05T09:28:00.003-05:00

"No-one ever told me what happens after you turn 40"

I seem to say this a lot in my blog. Why? Because it truly blows. And I'm not even a vain person! Can't see as well, can't lose weight as easily, already waking up soaking wet from night sweats, and boy howdy are body parts headed south.

I have always promised myself no negative self-talk on my yoga mat but when you are surrounded by mirrors on 3 sides and part of the practice is to focus on your eyes in the mirror, it just sometimes happens.

I've done so much damage to myself. 30 years of gaining and losing weight. How much of it can ever be fixed? Will my boobs ever point forward again? How can the skin on the inside of my thigh suddenly be sagging? Will I ever have a belly that doesn't hang below my shirt?

My muscles are taking great shape underneath this sagging outer layer that literally weighs me down. The more fat I lose, the more it sags.

I hugged my yoga instructor before class and I touched her stomach. I've never felt anything like it in my life. It was like touching a rock. I suddenly realize it's something I will never know. It's kind of sad.

This bit of frustration will in no way deter me from my goals. It just means I need to work harder (and maybe start saving some money for plastic surgery)

Back in the groove - me and about a billion other people

2012-01-03T13:47:00.006-05:00

Happy new year everyone!

My regular readers probably know that I'm usually a very positive person. Especially with the prospect of a fresh year ahead but honestly, I totally dread this time of year. The new years resolutioners clogging up the gym cause my anxiety levels to skyrocket. This year seems better so far since I have a smaller gym with less members and a trainer. Yoga on the other hand is going to be a nightmare tonight. The more people in the hot room the hotter it is which makes it hard to breathe and the smell is unbearable. I do have a plan though. Park far away. Arrive early to claim MY spot (all the regulars know my spot). Put a little Vicks or lavender oil under my nose. I WILL get through it KNOWING that half of the people breathing up my oxygen won't be back next week.

A survey of the damage from the holidays yielded only a 4 lb. gain but boy do I have some dark circles under my eyes from too much drinking and too much sugar. I only exercised about a quarter of what I usually do but I look at that as a victory! Last year I didn't do any. A week of clean eating and exercise will get rid of all of that.

Now for the goals for 2012:

1. Onederland by June when the Lulu Lemon store opens a store in the city. It's only 35 pounds and then I can buy my fancy pants. They only go up to a 12. I know I can do that.

2. Successfully do Floor Bow without being handed my left foot. (This is the only pose I can't do in Bikram!)

3. Take a spin class - totally terrifies me.

4. Walk the 3-day for the 3rd time in honor of my Aunt Carol who passed away after an 11 year battle with Breast Cancer. She died 2 days before Christmas but was in so much pain it was a blessing!

5. BLOG MORE!

There's going to be a lot going on up in here this year so stay tuned!!!

The little victories

2011-12-06T15:09:00.003-05:00

I can't believe it but I'm still in the groove and seriously motivated. I ate A LOT over the weekend but it's not so devastating to the diet when you are working for it. How is it that I'm two days away from being 42 and I'm just now realizing that?!?!

I don't have much time for a long post today but I wanted to make a note of my little non-scale victory today. I haven't had one of those in a while! My husband had surgery today for a hernia and after we got home, I ran out to get him some apple juice and his special request for a Twix bar. Normally I would have use HIS surgery to eat whatever I wanted (yeah, that's rational isn't it??) This time is different. This time I knew I would feel that way and I was prepared. Prepared with healthy food and prepared to say no. I picked up a Twix for him without so much as an urge to get one (or two) for myself. I had my 90 calorie granola thin planned for a sweet treat later and that is what I will have. AFTER yoga :)

I'm in a good place. Let's stay here for a while shall we?

better already

2011-12-01T09:03:00.002-05:00

I've been back at the fat fight hard core and it's totally working. 8 lbs down since thanksgiving. It's funny how just a weeks work can make all the difference in my attitude, my energy level and everything else.

The extra energy is a blessing for all the work I have at the moment PLUS the time and energy needed for my monster workouts, the never ending piles of soaking wet gym clothes to be washed and cooking healthy for every meal.

Dangerous times ahead but I think I'm in a good place to make it through the holidays, birthdays, parties and everything else that comes in December!

Monday mixtape is BACK

2011-11-28T12:37:00.003-05:00

Hooray for still feeling inspired! I worked out ALL through the Thanksgiving holiday weekend and because of that, I ate what I wanted and still lost 4 lbs.

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I haven't been pushing myself hard enough and have gotten too comfortable with my workouts. I think my trainer was feeling that too so she kicked it up a notch which is what made me remember what it felt like to be really sore - like serious weight loss sore. I need to live in that place for me to lose weight.

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For the first time in 2 years since I left the security of a full-time job, I feel like everything in place. I've found that work as a freelancer is plentiful as long as I work really hard. Now it's time to apply that to the fat fight.

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I restarted the couch to 5k and it's going well. Slow but well. I have the app on my ipad now which is nice so I don't have to watch the clock. If I had the iPhone it would be a LOT more convenient ~shakes fist at T-mobile~

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This is getting long so I will end with this...Does anyone else desire a pair of $98 Lulu Lemon workout pants as much as I do? New goal said aloud to trainer this morning - When I get to the magical Onederland I will buy myself some. 37 pounds to that goal. I'm ready!

Thankful and Inspired

2011-11-25T10:27:00.002-05:00

Thanksgiving was perfection (as I knew it would be). I spent it surrounded by friends and neighbors and never left my street. We had appetizers at one house, dinner at another, and dessert at ours around the campfire. I'm still smiling today and so thankful for my awesome life.

Yesterday started with cheering on a friend in the Thanksgiving half marathon and it was really inspiring. There are so many fit people in this town and I've always had this burning desire to be one of them. One would think that would be enough for me to do what it takes to get there but somehow it's not. Most of the time I'm my own worst enemy.

At some point today, I'm restarting couch to 5k. I plan to start at week 1 but since it's probably not necessary to start completely over, I'll move up in weeks or do it twice. This time I swear I won't push myself to move on until I'm really ready. I got sick once after my first 20 minute run and it made me discouraged enough to stop completely.

Okay enough computer time. Time to get movin'!!

Not giving in

2011-11-19T12:48:00.003-05:00

This morning in my core class I felt the effects of the way I've been eating literally getting in the way. My middle is growing again and it's making me miserable. I'm out of control and I have to reign it in.

My mantra for the coming week? Thanksgiving is ONE day, not a WEEK.

I know I can do this.

Technical difficulties

2011-11-14T09:04:00.002-05:00

Not sure how this whole thing works but I'm trying to fix my hacked blog! I'm hoping that no-one thinks I've given it all up :) If anyone has any advice, I'd be thrilled to hear it. I've googled my brains out, removed the malicious code (I think) and resubmitted to google. I have no time for this nonsense!!

Same old same old here. Still happy, still busy (thankfully!), and still fat. I work out and then I eat to make up for it. I'm back seeing my trainer one on one which is like therapy to me and if that doesn't work, it's real therapy. I have issues. I horde linens and I eat :)

I'm hoping that getting back to blogging will help motivate me especially through the dangerous weeks ahead. I will not allow myself to be that person just getting started again on new years day. There's a good amount of time between now and then and I'm choosing to get a head start.

Monday Mixtape - Bittersweet Blogiversary Edition

2011-08-29T13:49:00.003-04:00

Hi all. I totally apologize for my lack of updates but the usual craziness disclaimer applies. I know I've been bad when people are checking up on me.

Speaking of people checking up on me, y'all know that Shelley is my hero. I posed for this picture because it reminded me of her.

I haven't been on my bike in 7 years. First day - 4 blocks!

I just had my 3 year blogiversary but I chose not to acknowledge it because I don't feel very successful. Maybe that's a mistake and I should be celebrating all the progress I've made on the fitness front and I did say this year was about self discovery. I just don't feel like celebrating because I'm STILL not in control of my eating. Work has been even busier if that is even possible. After almost 2 years of owning my own business, I still can't say no to anything so I'm working an average of 12-14 hours a day. The days that get into the 'teens' range of hours are the dangerous days...the ones where my eating falls apart. Being too busy is the number one lamest excuse for being fat but sometimes I have to admit it's a huge factor.

I have 4 weeks until I go on the first vacation with my husband in over 3 years. We are going to the keys which to me, is heaven on earth. I could lose 10 pounds and be really happy so my goal is simply to keep up my pretty stellar workout routine, combine that with some calorie counting and hopefully get back to that feeling okay in a bathing suit place by then!

My mom said she didn't like my picture on my blog so I changed it. I just had to find a headshot for a business presentation so I used the same one. In case I've never said this before, my mom is always right!

Here's to a great week!

struggling!

2011-08-10T10:52:00.002-04:00

I have never been an ask for help when you need it kind of person which is really stupid when you think about it. I have a huge network of people who inspire me and have great ideas that get me through the tough times. That said, I'm reaching out.

Eating has been my downfall lately. I have been obsessed with food. Combine that with a terrible sweet tooth and zero interest in anything healthy and we have a problem. It almost makes me depressed when we only have chicken and vegetables for dinner?!?! I know I need to eat lunch but nothing sounds good. It doesn't help that I don't like vegetables all that much but I do force myself to eat them. I tried cutting way down on carbs and I thought it would cure my cravings but I can't deprive myself of anything when I'm working out this hard. I NEED the fuel.

I've put some more effort in this week to find ways to get more veggies in like making broccoli slaw and going to the farmers market for really fresh and interesting vegetables. It's easier in the winter because I hide them in chili, soup and sauces.

So, how do y'all get your veggies in? What keeps you full and satisfied? I'm all ears...er, I mean eyes! :)

Always a new day...

2011-08-09T14:07:00.002-04:00

I'm feeling MUCH better than last week thankfully so I thought I owed my blog some attention. Food poisoning is awful. I think it was grocery store sushi which is a bummer because I will never eat it again. Only the expensive stuff from now on!

The week has gotten off to a good start. I was really active over the weekend...well Saturday I was OVER active and Sunday was a little slow and sore. I had my group training class last night which was a killer and off to yoga tonight. I know that if I don't start doing cardio again regularly I'm not going to lose even though I feel great. The interesting this is my body fat is down between 7 and 10% which is probably why I feel great but again, I'm working too hard not be losing poundage.

I've been a little iffy with food yet so it's been hard to eat things like yogurt and vegetables but I'm still trying really hard to eat really healthy. I told my trainer that I almost ate something I shouldn't and then I remembered how hard our warm up was for this month and I didn't want to do that for nothing :) Yet another reason the exercise pays off.

Before I get back to work I wanted to say thank you so much to all my followers. I just hit the 500 mark and it was something I NEVER expected. I started this blog as a diary for myself and am still amazed every day that people care what I have to say! :) I'm not a writer by any means and it really means a lot that so many people have stuck around and supported me through good, bad, pounds lost, pounds gained. I've even made some wonderful friends along the way.

running in circles

2011-08-03T11:01:00.002-04:00

Sometimes I feel like my life is like running a race on a track. Some days you win, some days you lose but you never really get anywhere. Oh and there are plenty of hurdles to jump along the way.

Every week I set out with the best intentions in the world for week full of exercise and healthy eating. It's only Wednesday and I've already had a flat tire and food poisoning. I've had no exercise and have been living on white bread and ginger ale.

I forced down a yogurt this morning - so far so good - and I'm hoping to be back to exercising tomorrow but right now I feel like I got hit by a bus!
Here's hoping for some smooth sailing for a while. I need to make some progress and it's so hard when so much gets in the way.

Day 3 of 17

2011-07-27T10:22:00.003-04:00

Hi Y'all. I just hit my 16th year of living in Atlanta so I say that all the time now :)

Despite the hideous double mortgage payment incident, I haven't missed a beat and I'm truly proud of that. I so wanted to drown my sorrows in white bread and mac and cheese.

I started the 17 day diet Monday as planned and so far so good. The book is truly terrible. It talks about things like "becoming a hottie" and the food lists and recipes leave a lot to be desired. It's very basic - lean proteins, veggies, fruit and 2 servings of anything probiotic. That's the first 17 days. After that you slowly add whole grains back in. Maybe it's because I've done every diet known to man that it seems basic...that and I hate diets. I'm doing this because I had to do something.

I thought I'd be laying twitching in padded locked room like a heroin addict but it hasn't been that bad. After a dinner of protein and veggies I REALLY need a little something sweet so I've been having a sugar free jello pudding for 60 cals. Not on the plan but I don't see how it could really have that much of an effect on my progress.

Because there wasn't a ton of money to buy food this month, I roasted a 7 lb. chicken (more than I weighed as an infant!) on the grill and have therefore had very chicken-y week thus far. Chicken and vegetable soup has been great along with a spinach salad for lunch. Breakfast has been the same as always thankfully. Yogurt and berries - just omitted my usual handful of Kashi Go Lean Crunch. Dinner is some sort of protein on the grill (or more chicken) and veggies. I even did some mashed cauliflower which was a great starch substitute. There's not much more to it than that!

Today will be my first "challenge" which is lunch AND dinner out. The plan is to decide what I'm having ahead of time and sticking to it. It's really not that big of a deal I suppose...I just tend to make it a bigger deal than it needs to be.

A mid-week check in has me 4 lbs. down (hooray!) but I will report officially on Monday which will be 7 days from my start. I was up a full 11 pounds from my arm injury and I'm not wearing my new white pants again until that's gone!

On the fitness front, because I have a seriously awesome (and understanding) trainer, I've changed my personal training session over to one of her group sessions at least for the month. That way, I can still afford to have her - just not one-on-one (which I already miss!!). My schedule is pretty much the same as well Monday,Wednesday,Saturday is my group training which is a mix of pilates and weights, Tuesdays is my long standing bikram yoga class, Thursdays I run a 5k (on the treadmill for the summer) and Sundays have been my only off day. I'm planning on walking to my class on Saturday which is about 2 miles with a mega giant hill in both directions but since I have extra time on the weekends, I might as well make good use of it.

So it looks like I will make it over yet another huge hurdle in my life. I guess that's a huge part of this journey!!

Stronger but still weak

2011-07-22T10:51:00.001-04:00

I did the single dumbest thing I’ve ever done in my life.

I accidentally paid my mortgage twice.

Just so you know, if you ever do that, they don’t give it back.

As I watched my bank account go $2,000 in the negative, I have been eating like a crazy person and haven’t stopped. I feel awful. Bloated, weak, tired, nauseous…basically poisoned.

WTF is wrong with me that I turn to something that can make me feel so bad??? I guess that’s what heroin and meth addicts ask themselves as they continue to destroy themselves.

Day before yesterday, I was at my worst. I cried all day over losing our entire life savings over a stupid mistake. It’s been almost 2 years since I lost my job and that’s how long it’s taken to actually save up a couple grand again. I considered giving up my plan to start the 17 day diet (on Monday naturally!) and live on mac and cheese and white bread.

Then I came to my senses.

It doesn’t cost any more money to live on lean protein, veggies, fruit and yogurt which is what this plan is all about…at least for first few weeks.

So that’s that. I’m getting my sh*t together while I somehow work harder to make up for this devastating event.

I’ll be back on Monday for the day one update.

Let's talk about food

2011-07-18T11:48:00.002-04:00

Despite by busy schedule, you'll all be happy to know I have been working out like a crazy person. Every muscle hurts just about every day. It feels great and things are firm enough to wear white pants again but I have been ignoring the diet portion of this journey in a bad way.

I spend my precious down-time with my husband and friends – "rewarding" ourselves with food and drink. We haven't been going crazy on the junk, just richer food, eating out, larger portions, more alcohol etc. It's amazing how that behavior can creep back into your lifestyle slowly, without even noticing.

I work too hard to not be dropping weight so I'm thinking of starting the 17-day diet. I hate to even mention "diet" on this blog because I don't believe it them but I do believe in calorie shifting (lower one day, higher the next) to keep the metabolism guessing. This would just be a way for me to follow that a little more easily. I'm reading the book. I will let y'all know what I think. If anyone has any advice, I'm willing to hear it!

Have a great, healthy week everyone!

looking out for number one

2011-07-13T09:57:00.002-04:00

I'm so ridiculously busy but had to take just a minute to blog about another one of my many breakthroughs. Are you tired of them yet??? I guess since I dedicated this year to self discovery, it's not a bad thing :)

Anyway, the week got off to a great start. Exercise every day, really good eating etc. but that started to fade a little this morning as the work piled up. I emailed my trainer that I wasn't coming to class because I was on a ridiculous deadline and sat down at my desk to work. My yoga instructors website was on the screen and the second I saw her picture, I knew I had to go to class. I grabbed my shoes and ran out the door. Class was hard, I was dripping with sweat and it was already 90 degrees at 8:30 am but I felt SO great after.

I've been blessed with these two amazing, beautiful women in my life Karen, my trainer and Astrid, my yoga instructor. They are so encouraging and I WILL not let them down!

falling on the double edge sword

2011-06-29T17:14:00.003-04:00

Thanks for all the well wishes on the injury front!

I decided I would compromise and work out every other day this week which didn't start out to be such a great idea! After Monday's training session I was in so much pain I had to go to bed early even though she took great care in modifying things for my right arm. I was worried but woke up Tuesday feeling better than I had in weeks! I didn't go to yoga Tuesday but was back at my trainers core class early this morning - again feeling good! Even the cut is healing up quickly.

My husband called this afternoon to ask how I was and I said "I'm great! I'm busy but inspired." That's when it really hit me just how much I need my exercise routine for way more than weight management. It affects everything I do, every day. Energy, creativity, memory, focus, stress level - you name it...yet sometimes it's the hardest thing in the world to do. Especially when there's pain involved.

I guess sometimes we really do need to stop and take a step back to get a new perspective. Somehow things become easier for me on this journey when it becomes less about the weight loss and more about my well being. Now that's something to ponder! :)

always a battle

2011-06-27T11:21:00.003-04:00

Do you ever just get tired of fighting with yourself? I never fight with anyone. Only myself. Only about food and exercise.

The debate rages on in my head this morning as I'm sporting yet another injury of the right side variety. I sliced open my thumb and ended up going to urgent care for stitches on Saturday. Of course I waited too long so I could only get glued and taped but at least it's put back together and I'm not going to get tetanus.

The cut took my mind of the tendonitis for a few days but now it ALL hurts which severely impacts my big plans for workouts this week. I'm fine except from the right elbow down so I KNOW I can do most of what I have planned but the pain makes me want to sit on the couch and eat and feel sorry for myself. I want it to go away and I feel like if I keep pushing myself it's never going to get any better. Last time I tried to stop and heal I gained 9lbs.

I'm really trying not to be so cranky about it but that's what happens when I'm frustrated. Injuries, constant power outages from storms every other day, having to listen to everyone talk about vacations.... I'm hoping if I at least try to work out this week, I may loose the crappy attitude :)

Diving back in

2011-06-17T09:29:00.002-04:00

Ever since my hero (and friend) Shelley started swimming I've been DESPERATE to get back in the pool. That and it went from spring straight to 100 degrees here in the ATL. I may have mentioned, I had to quit the Y because I was paying way too much for a pool and gym that was dirty and gross. It literally turned my stomach in the early mornings.

Luckily I was talking to a friend of mine who mentioned the women's college just up the street has water aerobics for only $5!!! Women's college means only women in the pool. No offense men but to me that's a huge bonus! :)

The class is Monday and Friday at 7am which means I still have to train on Monday and go to Yoga on Friday but the double workouts seem to be the only thing that really makes the pounds come off. That's 6 classes a week folks. I'll be broke AND tired! I can say for sure that going to all these classes has made me much less nervous about going to new classes.

INJURY UPDATE:
Arm WAS doing great until the mass amounts of ibuprofen made me barf for 24 hours. I'm still a little shaky from it and haven't had any since but I did lose 5 of the 9 pounds I gained because of it. Not really the way I wanted to lose it but whatever....I'm going back to (almost) full strength workouts Monday no matter what. I can probably do everything but one pose in yoga and push-ups/dips. Sorry Karen :)

Have an awesome weekend everyone. I'm headed to moms the mountains where it's 10 degrees cooler!

Monday mix tape - good news and bad news edition

2011-06-13T15:21:00.007-04:00

I can't believe it's been a week since I last posted. What was worse is that I looked back on the positivity in that last post and realized I need to get back up there again!

The bad news:

The arm injury finally got the best of me and I went to the doctor on Friday. I have a classic case of tendonitis and am not allowed to lift weights until it's 100% better. Other than that I can do just about anything but the constant pain doesn't help with motivation for exercise. I've taken good care of it over the last few days and hope it goes away soon. What's the rush you ask? I've gained 9 freaking pounds.

The good news:

I did a 3 minute plank. I swear I thought my trainer was crazy when she said that was something people did.
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The guy at the Goodwill donation truck told me I was looking great. He's seen me shrink the last few months as I keep handing him more and more clothes that no longer fit. I found that laugh out loud to myself funny.
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I just ordered peanut butter online for the first time which I find very strange but oh well! I tried a Justin's Nut Butter Honey Peanut Butter 80 calorie pack at Starbucks and it was amazing. I just ordered 40 packs. Finally a way to eat peanut butter and banana (or apple!) at my desk. It's seriously delicious.
At least there are more good things on the list than bad but the bad was a serious blow.

The plan for the week is to focus on cardio and cut down on the carbs. I hope to get this 9 lbs off as quick as it came on. I have to have to have to keep going!

Monday mix tape

2011-06-06T17:31:00.004-04:00

I'm back! My arm is feeling much better and my trainer is back from vacation just in time. I just had a great, sweaty workout despite taking it easy on my arm. I could have been working around it all along but the rest felt needed and it made me all that more excited to get back. Needless to say, I'm going to avoid the scale for another week and just focus on getting back to full strength. Funny what a lot of stress and a lot of pain can do to ones virtuous eating habits.

I was trying to explain to my trainer how I felt while she was gone and I was injured. It was difficult to put into words. I felt like a slug. Slow, weak, tired, barely wanting to move. The fact that its in the high 90s here isn't helping but I know what the real culprit was. We ate out a lot during that time and it was that oh so delicious combo of sugar, salt, fat and processed carbs. Delicious and poisonous.

So, in a week of not much progress on the physical front, there was a ton of progress made on the mental front. Never in my life have I enjoyed my workouts enough to miss them. I've also never been this in tune with my body and paying attention to what makes me feel good (and not good!) These are the makings of a lifestyle change and not the on again, off again roller coaster ride I've been on as long as I can remember.

Hey, Hot Wing Lady part deux

2011-06-03T08:34:00.002-04:00

It's been another non-stop week here but I'm hanging in there and enjoying my work even though there are not enough hours in the day to do it all!! I'm grateful for the abundance of work as well as the energy and God given talent to make it all look nice :)

Something happened last night I had to share. Almost three years ago I wrote this post about my relationship with chicken wings and the lady that makes them at the local supermarket.

Things have changes so much grocery shopping wise. I rarely venture into the middle aisles anymore except for dog supplies, toilet paper and salt and vinegar PopChips. I wouldn't recognize my cart if I lost it so I keep it close by. I used to be embarrassed by it especially if a weekend was coming up. I have been asked if I was having a party and I wasn't. God that's horrifying.

Anyway, I was in the seafood department and the chicken wing maker was behind the counter and came running out after me, hugged me and said "I saw you and your husband the other day and I hardly recognized you both. You look so great no wonder I haven't seen you in a while!"

I SO needed that encounter.

I was stressed and feeling snacky. I haven't been working out all week due to an arm injury that happened sometime over the weekend. I must have pulled a muscle because I haven't even been able to make a fist or lift my coffee. It's feeling better but now I'm dreading getting back to it. Just goes to show myself I can't ever stop. If I were like Shelley, I wouldn't let the injury get in my way but I did and now I'm going to pay for it!! :)

inspired!

2011-05-25T10:20:00.002-04:00

Because of this:I did this:

2 minute 45 second plank!

That is all :)

Monday Mix Tape - late edition

2011-05-24T11:32:00.003-04:00

I'm not really doing well with my Monday posts am I??

Still really busy. Too busy but not complaining. EVER. I've even brought some old co-workers in to help me get all this work done. We joke that we're "getting the band back together" and I love it! Yesterday was my longest day in history. 17 hours of work. It was fun work but LONG.

My workouts have suffered this week but thankfully I've been doing well with my eating so we're maintaining this week. I had to cancel my trainer appointment yesterday to go to a printer - that was the first time I've had to do that in the 12 weeks or so I've been doing it so I guess it's not horrible. No way will I let this spell of crazy get me off track.

In the midst of all the crazy, I had this brilliant idea for an anniversary gift for our neighbors. Of course I put it off until the last minute and got them in their back yard literally 5 minutes before they came home from vacation.Now we all have our own pillows and chairs around the fire pit - just in time for the hot summer! :) I made them all out of fabric from the Ikea clearance bin. Eventually I'd like to sell these on Etsy. I think they would make a great wedding gift. If only there were more hours in a day....

I'm going to yoga tonight even though I went to bed at 2:30 am and got up at 6. I'm so stiff and sore from being cramped up in my work chair and I'm ready to sweat again. I can't believe how much I miss exercise when I don't get it these days. I've always wanted that feeling and I finally got it!

Have a great, healthy week!

Monday Mix Tape (Wednesday edition)

2011-05-18T10:13:00.001-04:00

I've been desperate to have a minute to post to thank y'all for your incredibly kind support after my 5k on Saturday. I feel like a superstar :) I'm also glad some I could offer some inspiration - I swear, if I can do it you can do it too!

The day after the race I was having some shin pain and decided to call the running store and find out when I bought my shoes. They were 10 months old already so I decided I deserved a new pairThese are the updated version of what I had and the are so nice and bouncy!

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Things are crazy busy on the work front (amen!) but that means no double workouts this week. I did manage at least an hour every day so far but I'm feeling the effects from stress of it all. I know that the workouts will help me deal with it better but sometimes it's really hard to step away from work to go to yoga or run.

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I've had a love hate relationship with the Biggest Loser over the years but there is REALLY something special about this season's group. They are amazing and every single one of them has already won. I'm motivated by every single word that they say. Jillian BOWED to Olivia at the end last night. You seriously know you did a good job if Jillian bows down to you!!! It was very touching and I don't think I've ever seen the trainers so affected by a group like that before. This whole idea that one of "us" could motivate the trainers is new to me but I get it a little more now.

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I've come to the conclusion that I only lose weight one week out of the month. Blame it on hormones, age, perimenopause, or all of the above, but I'm starting to be okay with it. I should see a little loss again in the next week or two. I still check my weight every day but I don't let it affect me like I used to. I've learned that living this way is much less about the scale and so much more about feeling strong and accomplishing awesome things.

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Speaking of awesome, if anyone is trying to keep up with my record setting planks, you've got to kick it up a notch
2 minutes 31 seconds
That's right. New record set on Monday. Karen saw the whole thing. I need to think about how I will celebrate getting to 3 minutes :)

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Now I must work. Have a great and healthy rest of the week!

5k number 3

2011-05-14T11:07:00.004-04:00

I have to say this whole 'athletic' thing is fun :)

A nice picture before the race with my runner friend and neighbor.
I look like I'm on drugs and haven't even had my 5 hour energy yet. I was just really excited!

I'm still smiling since it's just started

Not as smiley but still having fun!

I can't believe how much progress I've made since my last 5k only 8 weeks ago.
10 minutes faster!!

While I was out there I could literally feel the core work I've been doing. I could feel the strength in my abs and my hips as picked up my legs and I'm able to take much bigger strides (well as big as my 2 foot long legs allow!)

A special shout out to Karen for helping me get so strong, caring about my core, and helping me feel good wearing that tight t-shirt with those really short sleeves ;)

Oh and I can't forget to thank our supportive spouses who enjoyed coffee and pastries while taking pictures!

Nirvana - not just a band

2011-05-11T11:05:00.002-04:00

I always seem to head out to my yoga class feeling excited really good about myself. I've shed some pounds, have a few cute new workout outfits and can now do every one of the 26 poses without modifying anything. I'm almost ready to move out of the back row - almost.

As I've mentioned before, looking at yourself in the mirror is a huge part of the meditative side of the practice. Noticing how you feel at different times is also important and it's not always pleasant. I was troubled when I realized just how deflated I feel when I look in the mirror. I FEEL like I look like all the other girls in the class and there I am, faced with the big fat truth.

I made a decision right then that there was never going to be any negative self-talk in that room again.

I pay $16 a class to be there. The place is built on positivity. It makes me feel amazing. I'm better at it than some of the skinniest girls in there. I deserve it.

I know it's human nature to compare but I owe it to myself to let that kind of thinking go and not allowing it at the yoga studio is a good start. I will do my best to dig deep and focus on the progress I have made and not how far I have to go - especially when the journey feels so long. Maybe it will help to change what I see looking back at me.

A work in progress

2011-05-09T14:48:00.003-04:00

Sometimes when I'm doing really well, I feel invincible and then when I make a bad choice, I beat myself up. I've been doing that all day and I thought it would be a good idea to blog about it and move on.

Friday night my husband was out. In the past I would have "stocked up" for this which is something Lyn always manages to blog so openly and honestly about. I would have gotten all my favorite food and settled in for a night of eating and watching TV. I was very proud of myself for going to yoga and coming home and eating some shrimp, spinach and white beans. Not sure what happened but by the time I had gone to bed, I had probably managed to eat another 500 calories in a kitchen that has nothing but healthy food in it. Way too much peanut butter, some cereal, a piece of chocolate, some Pop Chips.

The rest of the weekend I ate way too much and polished it off by drinking way too many cheap margaritas which of course led to waking up too hungover to work out.

I got on the scale this morning and saw the damage and was really disappointed with myself. I think that's the best way to put it. I'm not really upset about what I ate and/or drank. More about the fact that I "checked out" for the weekend and didn't even try to make up for it with exercise.

This particular part of this journey for me is all about self discovery. The why behind it all. After dwelling on this for far too long today I've come to the conclusion that last week I pushed myself too hard towards a number on the scale and probably didn't eat enough. That left me exhausted and starving by Friday night. I know better than that and will try not to let it happen again.

I'm hoping to undo the damage very quickly since I have a 5k to run on Saturday morning. The plan for the week is less meat and more water, making sure to fuel myself properly for the crazy amounts of exercise I'm doing.

Moving on now!!! Here's to a healthy week!

A great week

2011-05-06T15:48:00.002-04:00

I was hoping to have time today to do a nice, long, thought provoking post but I just finished working and have to leave for yoga in 10 minutes.

I worked my butt off this week. I ate flawlessly despite a dinner party mid-week and a concert last night. I ate smaller portions and I was drenched with sweat every day from working out. I was in total control and it worked.

3 pounds down! Every one of them earned! :) We are almost to the teens! Have a great weekend everyone!

Monday Mix Tape

2011-05-02T14:15:00.004-04:00

The weekend started with this at 5am on Friday

(edited to protect the innocent and famous)

Today is the first day I did 45 minutes of cardio intervals (minute run, minute walk) BEFORE I go to the trainer. Pray for me!
In reference to the above bullet, I WILL get up and do cardio in the morning instead of putting it off until lunch to avoid 3 showers in one day. Double workouts are hard enough and I might as well maximize my time!
Today is also the first day I ever wore a tank top to the regular gym. I wear one to yoga but that's different. Of course I saw someone I know but she was very supportive!
Peanut butter and banana do not make a good desk snack. I forget that natural peanut butter is nice and hard when it comes out of the fridge but then it gets really runny. Also do not put anything that has touched runny peanut butter in your Michael Kors bag!
I 'came out of the closet' and have shared my blog with some more people I know. Shout out to Mom, Meg, Laura, Amy, Alison and my sweet husband. After my experience yesterday I just thought it was time.
Have a healthy, happy week everyone!

swim on

2011-05-01T13:24:00.012-04:00

I don't normally post on the weekend but I had an experience over the weekend that I just had to share.

My Scottish niece and her boyfriend were in town for the weekend so we brought them to a neighborhood arts festival and had a blast walking around and looking at everything. I was so excited to see that my favorite local artist had a booth. I had purchased a piece from her a few years ago at a folk art festival and fell in love with her because she kept all her money in her giant bra and was the happiest most inspirational woman I had ever met. Her work is a wonderful combination of found objects and inspirational messages.

This one was destined to be mine

Mary is a very large black woman with equally large hair and dark sunglasses. She also wears headphones which I'm not sure are connected to anything. I spotted her right away, went over to say thank you and brought my niece with me so she could take our picture.

As we were walking away she said, gesturing to her ample curves,
"honey, I know you is tryin' and remember, you don't have to lose it all"

I was floored. My niece was in shock. How did she know??? Granted, you could assume that most larger people are trying to lose weight but I kind of have this (maybe) crazy feeling that she's some sort of guardian angel and that message was made for me.

I told the story to my my mom and she suggested that maybe I'm more open to those messages these days. Yoga helps and so does spending a lot of time inside my own head trying to work out the underlying cause of my struggles.

Even today I still feel emotional about it. It was a VERY important encounter I will never ever forget. That gorgeous piece of art is hanging where I can see it every day, next to the original one which I blogged about on my 4th post. Almost 3 years ago.

Mary, I know you will probably never read this but thank you. I be tryin' every day.

p.s. I finally lost another pound.

5 good reasons to do a plank

2011-04-27T09:51:00.006-04:00

Something amazing happened in my class this morning and I just HAD to share.

I was doing my required plank and zoning out as much as possible in an effort to make it a little easier. I heard someone say "way to go T" and I looked around and I was the only one still up at the 1 minute 30 second mark!! I decided to try for 2 minutes and she tricked me into 2 minutes 5 seconds. Yes you read that right. 2 minutes 5 seconds.

That's the second time this week I made it to 2 minutes so I guess that's the new plank standard. Raising the bar once again!

Don't get me wrong, I don't love it but I do it. Here's why you should too. I even included a picture though I prefer to do it with shoes on.

According to my trainer, it's the best exercise to do for all your muscles
It's free
It's fast
Requires no equipment or even changing clothes
Progress happens FAST

Drop and do one now. I'll wait...

Seriously, I couldn't dream of even doing a minute when I started this a just 12 weeks ago.

*I'm so grateful for the encouragement of Karen, my trainer, and all the amazing women in my class for cheering me on even though they barely know me. I'd also like to thank my husband who graciously does them with me.

*That was my 2 minute plank award speech :)

Monday Mix Tape

2011-04-25T09:14:00.005-04:00

Beautiful Easter weekend in the ATL! I ate and drank way too much but had so much fun just hanging out with my husband - it was worth it :) We did a TON of yard work including building the first level of a retaining wall/planter with 20 pound (each) blocks. Both days I soaked through my clothes so it was a serious workout. I was barely moving when I went to bed last night but woke up feeling surprisingly good - which is fortunate since I have my Monday training session later today!

Not a lot is happening on the weight loss front (more on that in a minute) but so much great stuff is happening to my body AND my brain so here's a list of non-scale victories. (bullet points of course!)

Yesterday I felt like running from the parking lot of Lowes into the store with the big wagon. So I did.
I'm so strong these days that I run up and down the stairs without holding the railing
Recovery has gotten so fast. So much so I'm looking forward to training this afternoon after a ridiculous hard weekend of yard work.
Confidence is through the roof and people are noticing
My husband said the face he fell in love with is reappearing (awww!)
Yoga on Friday night was easy !?!?!

Now for the scale not moving part. I'm not blaming that on anything but my diet. There haven't been many vegetables and there were several nights of eating out - things were just nutty last with lots of unexpected plans. I haven't gained thanks to all my working out but I do need to be losing. For the next 3 days, I'm not eating any meat and tons of vegetables in hopes of getting a few pounds off before my Scottish niece arrives on Thursday. The old me would have considered this week a loss and "started again next Monday" That in itself is progress.

Okay before I go, I don't know what the deal was with Easter candy this year. It was SO tempting. I was strangely drawn to, and even got close to a giant Reese's Peanut Butter Egg. The smell of it all was intoxicating. I'm glad the candy will be gone from the front door of the store and back somewhere in the middle aisles where it belongs - where I never go anymore!

where bananas go to die

2011-04-20T15:34:00.010-04:00

It seems like whenever I buy a bunch of bananas, they are great one day and the next they look like this

I had always thought about turning them in to banana bread (which I only started liking as an adult) but I know that traditional recipes have horrific fat and calorie counts.

SOOO after much research into healthier recipes (and taste testing of course), The Hungry Girl Banana bread recipe wins hands down. This is quickly becoming my favorite breakfast on the go.

My kitchen is ridiculously small and I have to use my stove for extra counter space.

Lucy does not help

Ingredients:
1 1/4 cups whole-wheat flour
1/4 cup all-purpose flour
3/4 cup Splenda No Calorie Sweetener (granulated)
1 1/2 cups mashed ripe bananas (about 3 bananas)
1/2 cup fat-free liquid egg substitute (like Egg Beaters)
1/2 cup no-sugar-added applesauce
2 tsp. baking powder
1 tsp. vanilla extract
1/2 tsp. cinnamon
1/2 tsp. salt
Optional Toppings: no-calorie spray butter, Cool Whip Free

Directions:
Preheat oven to 350 degrees. In a large bowl, combine both types of flour, Splenda, baking powder, salt, and cinnamon (in other words, all dry ingredients). In a separate bowl, mix together the mashed bananas, egg substitute, applesauce, and vanilla extract (all the wet ingredients). Add this mixture to the bowl with the dry ingredients, and stir until just blended. Spoon batter into a large loaf pan (about 9" X 5") sprayed with nonstick spray. Bake for about 50 minutes, or until a knife inserted in the middle comes out clean. Allow to cool slightly, and then cut into 8 slices. If you like, spritz with some spray butter or spread on some Cool Whip Free. MAKES 8 SERVINGS

Serving Size: 1 (thick!) slice
Calories: 140
Fat: 0.5g
Sodium: 267mg
Carbs: 31g
Fiber: 3.75g
Sugars: 7g
Protein: 5g

Yum

share with nice neighbors

the urban garden

2011-04-18T18:31:00.008-04:00

It's that time of year around here when eating healthy becomes a little more fun.

Romaine ready to eat almost every day

cilantro, parsley, mint and rosemary

2 varieties of heirloom tomatoes. I'm the only one that eats them or there would be more!

swiss chard - hopefully getting big enough to go in a "gratin of greens" recipe my mom sent.

Jalapeño - you will be lovely paired with those tomatoes in some salsa

I call this one "sophie with sage " :)

I've been really busy with the garden so far this season and I can do so much more this year than I could last year. It worked outside all day Sunday and then had to go to the trainer today with really sore shoulders and hamstrings. She was very sweet about it and worked around my soreness and I still got a great workout.

Tomorrow is cardio in the morning and yoga and night which is a tough one. It almost killed me last week but I have to keep pushing myself that little bit more. It seems every pound is a fight but it's a fight worth having!

A little wobble

2011-04-14T17:24:00.003-04:00

I've been on a roll now for months and yesterday was my first bad day in a really long time. I don't know what was wrong with me. I made it through yoga on Tuesday night and even with my favorite teacher and all her compliments, I didn't enjoy it. Wednesday morning I skipped my group training class because I didn't even think my body could move. I dragged myself into the office all cranky. I felt like someone had secretly replaced my coffee with decaf. All day I felt nauseous, tired, anxious, and wanting to eat anything with carbs. I had some popcorn and that helped but then had a double serving of red potatoes for dinner. Other than that, I think I managed to maintain control.

It never ceases to amaze me how I can be moving along and feeling great and then all of a sudden, like a switch, want to eat everything in sight and don't want to move. It makes me think about how many times I've given into that after so much progress had been made. I was really scared that it was one of those times again. I went to bed early so I wouldn't eat anything else :)

Luckily, I woke up today feeling much better, though a bit flabby. I got an email from my trainer asking me how I was feeling which lifted my spirits even more so I'm making up my missed class tonight and looking forward to it. I certainly won't feel flabby after that! I ate great all day and am looking forward to a yummy stir fry after my class.

I guess we all have our "off" days where we just aren't ourselves. When our bodies are screaming STOP, REST, EAT! I probably shouldn't panic like I did yesterday because I know I have the strength and the support to get through those days.

Hello from the next level

2011-04-12T10:24:00.002-04:00

Thank you so much for all the great feedback on my post about my goals for onederland. I've decided It can't hurt to really try for 2 pounds a week for the next 12 weeks but I'm not going to obsess about it nor will I get upset about it if it doesn't happen. The important part is pushing myself to get there regardless of when it happens.

On that note I have really pushed myself up a level on the exercise front. Thursdays had been my off day but now it's 5k day. I'm also doing at least 30 extra minutes of cardio on trainer day. Today I'm excited I "only" have yoga. I love how a 75 minute Bikram class seems like a light day! I've come a long way and I have no intention of stopping. The more I do, the more I have energy to do. It's truly amazing.

Weekends I could probably be doing a little more but since it's yard work season and I tend to soak through my clothes on a Saturday and Sunday, I count it as a workout. That probably won't be the case when it's in the 100s but that's when the treadmill with the fan pointed at it becomes a great option :)

I really feel like there's no going back now. I'm looking forward to a summer full of activity instead of dreading wearing short sleeves. That, to me, is freedom!

The quest for onederland

2011-04-06T10:38:00.002-04:00

It's so nice to finally see my hard work paying off on the scale again. If only the weight loss was as consistent as my workouts we'd be fine! :)

As I work my way into the teens, I can't help but think about the next big goal - the almighty onederland. Last time I was there was shortly after my wedding. I look forward to getting there and staying for the rest of my days!

I haven't been setting weight loss goals because it's been so up and down even though I'm being as healthy as I can be. I've been great at accepting that it's just one of those things that comes along with being in my 40s and focusing on the wonderful changes in myself and my body. It got me thinking that it might just be fear of failing that keeps me from setting any real goals.

Is it time to push myself and set an attainable goal?

I have 24 pounds to lose to get to onderland and exactly 12 weeks until I go to the beach for a week. It would be "onederful" to revisit our honeymoon destination close to my honeymoon weight!

I'm interested in what you my dear blog friends have to say about this. I'm really scared to commit to that but then again I was scared to go to Bikram and look at me now - the master Yogini :) Discuss!

Tales from the City

2011-04-04T18:33:00.018-04:00

I had a wonderful time on my whirlwind trip to New York. It's a wonderful place but I'm happy to be home where it's quiet :)

As promised, I ate and drank my way across the city

started out Friday at this fabulous French restaurant for lunch

then we went shopping on 5th avenue where the only interesting thing I saw was this
(Barbie Fooseball table in FAO Schwartz - my friend has a kids to shop for - it's the only reason I was there but this made it worth it!)

Friday Nights dinner was another culinary adventure we shared the pasta and didn't have dessert!

I think there was a bagel and a Latte Saturday morning before shopping which I didn't take a picture of and we really didn't eat lunch because we were saving room for this

Great dinner with old friends too. Went to a beer bar after and stayed out until 1 in the morning.
This is me with my boyfriend from when I was 16!

Sunday Brunch was at Balthazar and it was also divine. I couldn't bring myself to photograph my food in there. Too fancy :) After that we went here

Belive it or not we didn't eat anything but I bought this fancy insulated lunch bag

Okay so now I'm back, stepped on the scale and guess what?? I lost 4 pounds. I bet we walked 15 miles and it paid off! So awesome to have such a blast and have that to come back to!

I'm back to eating like a normal person. Had some brown rice sushi and some fruit for lunch and a turkey burger for dinner.

My trainer is gone this week on vacation so I will have to find ways to amuse myself. Tonight we took a good hour walk but tomorrow morning I'm going to hit the gym in the morning and go to yoga in the evening. It's a good week to start trying to do both yoga and cardio on the same day since I won't be going to her class which is my hardest workout of the week.

It feels great to have taken a break and it feels equally as good to get back to my routine. Have a great week everyone!!

eat, drink, shop

2011-03-31T10:23:00.002-04:00

I'm headed to NYC tomorrow with my business partner for work and fun (mostly fun).
For the first time in a really long time, I will enjoy myself without guilt. I have earned this like never before! I don't plan on going crazy but I will enjoy myself and make up for it with a ton of walking and of course a little 80's bowling at the Bowl Mor.

I managed to lose another pound which seems like a miracle these days but I'm enjoying my workouts and the changes in my body so much it doesn't matter! I'll still be taking this trip at my lowest weight in 6 years. woohoo!

Have a great weekend everyone. I will post again on Monday with pictures!

Not horrible

2011-03-25T09:38:00.004-04:00

I have been waiting patiently all week to see the official pictures from the 5k (since there was no way I was going to run with my camera) and they aren't nearly as awful as I thought they might be! Now y'all know I'm not a negative person but I was terrified I wouldn't see any progress.

I was wrong. I see tons of progress. Physical and otherwise. I also look just like my dad :)

It's only getting better from here.

I'm better than brownies

2011-03-23T14:56:00.003-04:00

I'm sitting at my desk trying to work while the smell of freshly baked brownies dances around my head. I'm making them for my sisters birthday party and didn't think it would be this hard. I had to rinse out the bowl fast before I licked it. I'm staying strong because my limbs are still like jello after my morning group training session which is a fabulous (and ass kicking) hour of pilates and weightlifting. I'm not going to ruin an hours work for 30 seconds of brownie bliss :)

I busied myself unpacking and washing all my CSA veggies and I think I might make some Kale chips?!?!?! Not sure how they are but people have been known to eat them. Playing 'Iron Chef' with my box is helping me stay focused.

Last nights yoga class was probably one of the most successful I've had yet. Even though the scale hasn't gone down much, I'm noticing so much less fat getting in the way of my poses. The looking at myself in the mirror is happening a little more each time and last night my favorite instructor said how much more defined my poses are becoming. I practically skipped out of there. I joke with my husband about my girl crush on her but it's nothing more than a classic case of falling in love with your therapist :)

I'm off to go frost those damn brownies now.

calling all runners (and opinionated non-runners!)

2011-03-21T11:20:00.004-04:00

Most of the time I use my blog to blah blah blah about myself but today I need some advice from all my wise readers as I build up my mad running skillz.

My plan is to run every other day and at least one of those days do the full 5k distance. (keep in mind that I'm supplementing this with two 90 minute Bikram yoga classes, a personal training session and a group training class)

I thought I would do that for a couple of months until I'm good and comfortable with the 5k distance then take it to the next level and join a running group.

Part of me thinks I'm putting off the joining a group part of this because I'm slow and scared but the other part of me thinks it's wise to get a little better at it.

Do I wait a while and build up some more skills and confidence or do I dive right in?

I'm so analytical these days....

Time for some change up in here and 5k recap

2011-03-20T13:24:00.004-04:00

As a designer, I couldn't deal with my blog design that didn't match my mood anymore. I was sad and scared when I did the old one and it really reflected that. The title stays the same even though I'm not swimming much anymore but that could change any day knowing me!!

I don't normally post on a Sunday but I'm still flying high from my first (running) 5k. I did it and I ran the whole thing except for a really steep and very stinky hill behind the zoo. The water stop was there too so I had to drink while covering my mouth and trying to move as fast as possible. The rest of the time was shear joy with a few "you can't do this" moments mixed in. I haven't come THAT far yet ;)

As you can see, my 50 minute 52 second pace but was not record setting but I was so freaking proud of myself it didn't matter.

This morning I got up at 6am (again) to go out and support the Worlds Nicest Ex-boyfriend and his sister. My best friend came with me and we sat on the side of the road and drank coffee in the dark waiting for the start. The first to come through were the wheelchair racers (never ceases to amaze me - the hills here are brutal - I can't imagine) WNEBF came through and even stopped to give us a big sweaty hug. Sister and Mrs. WNEBF walked the half and came through towards the end. WNEBF finished the full in 4:30 and the girls finished the half in 4:00 on the nose.

So proud of them all which brings me to the real point of this post.

I have learned so much about myself in the last 6 months of going to yoga and I realized that the secret to it all is consistency. Why has it taken me 41 years to learn this? If I miss even one yoga class It sets me back 2 weeks. If I would skip 1 day of C25K it would set me back 2 weeks in the program. This is a huge revelation for me. Combine that with all my inspiration and energy to spare and we have a winning combination.

I have to take this huge success of my 5k and build on it. There's no going back - just like there's no going back when I set a new personal plank record or jump rope record.

I will RUN that damn half marathon next year and I hope y'all will continue to hang in there for this crazy ride.

Pants on the ground

2011-03-17T10:32:00.004-04:00

Remember this guy? A local Atlantan, famous for about a week. I can't get this out of my head today!

I'm officially down to one pair of pants. Not one pair from last summer fit. 7 pairs of capri's are going to Goodwill and I can't say I will miss them.

Let this be a reminder to y'all to put new clothes in the fitness budget so you're not "lookin' like a fool with your pants on the ground".

I will post again after my 5k on Saturday with pictures!

all good

2011-03-15T11:17:00.002-04:00

Another week, another crazy schedule. I can't believe how easily I'm keeping up with all of this! Between work and working out I'm surprised I still have the energy to do anything else but I continue to surprise myself! I've always heard that exercise gives you tons of energy for other things but I can't remember the last time I experienced that...until now!

I have been enthused about cooking again, I can run around with my friends kid, I can walk up the stairs to get something and not be out of breath. The yard work we did this past weekend would have killed me last year but this time it was even fun and I had enough energy left to make dinner for my neighbors!

The scale this week is another story. Tom is here and brought 6 pounds of bags with him which is all water. I can feel myself sloshing around. Yoga tonight should take care of that! :) I have had a much healthier attitude toward the scale these days because I see and feel big changes taking place.

What's most different is I'm looking forward to everything I'm doing. Sunday nights I get excited to go back to my week of yoga and training. Truly a miracle.

Tonight is yoga, tomorrow is my group training class, Thursday is a run/walk, Friday is yoga again and Saturday morning is my 5k. I know I will be really bummed on Sunday during the half marathon I can't participate in but maybe having done the 5k will ease the pain.

Feel good everyone!

not so fat Tuesday

2011-03-08T10:53:00.003-05:00

I meant to post this yesterday but ran out of time!!

I saw 228 on the scale yesterday morning. The lowest I've been in 6 months. I feel like a million bucks!

This morning I was super brave and went to my trainers group class which is a combination of weightlifting and pilates. When I got home from yoga last night I wasn't sure it was going to be possible. I looked like a drowned rat and could barely keep my eyes open but I was up at 6 and ready to go! It was an awesome group of women befitting of my most awesome trainer. I knew I would LOVE it and I can't wait to go back. Wanna hear the best part????

1 minute, 30 second plank.

When she told us our time I had to have her repeat it because I didn't believe it. The only problem with increasing your plank time is that you have raised the bar and have to do that or better the next time ;)

On the health front
The respiratory therapist says "guuurrrrllll....there aint NOTHIN wrong with you" and the Pulmonologist says it seems to be nothing more than allergy related asthma. I can't do any half marathons until the Advair starts fully working but I can do the 5k. It's a week from Saturday and because I walk/run that distance regularly, It should be a breeze. The worlds nicest ex boyfriend is coming in town to do the full marathon and his sister (who I was going to do the half with) is still doing it so I will be on the sidelines the following day cheering them on. Next year I will be in it!

I could go on for days but I have a ton of work to do. Hope everyone is having a great week. Thanks as always for your support. It's all finally coming together.

Monday Mix tape - bullet point edition

2011-03-07T14:54:00.005-05:00

I spent 27 hours this weekend working on a Powerpoint (hence the bullet points) If it had been sunny out I don't think I could have made it through.
I'm super excited about my training session which is in 58 minutes. I'm going to up my plank time to 1 min 10 sec and my jumpropes to 100. I have on my super strength bra. Looking forward to exercise is huge progress.
I lost another 1.2 pounds since I posted last Tuesday. Yes, that's right, even over the weekend. I was 230 this morning. I will greet the 220s with much rejoicing. Lower than 228 is all "fresh pounds" that were not put on over Christmas :)
My appointment with the pulmonologist is tomorrow. I'm a little freaked out but I'm pretty certain it's all treatable. Hopefully I haven't done any permanent damage and that I'm on the right path to being healthy.
Have a good week everyone!

It moved

2011-03-01T16:13:00.002-05:00

The scale. Finally. Moved.

Longest plateau ever.

I have seen 233.4 on the scale every day since before Christmas. 231.2 this morning. I could have jumped for joy. Long may it continue.

Tonight is yoga and tomorrow morning I'm trying my trainers class that's a combination of weight training and pilates . I'm really excited about it but it's going to be tough. I've seen so much progress in the few weeks I've been training with her. (Shout out to Karen - you are amazing!)

Oh and yesterday I jumped rope. 60 times. Haven't done that since the 1970s!!

when your body lets you down

2011-02-22T11:09:00.003-05:00

No one ever told me that when you hit your forties, it all starts to go downhill.

I've considered myself lucky for so long that I haven't had any issues related to my years of obesity, a history of smoking, drinking etc. I was a seriously healthy person.

My recent asthma diagnosis was only part of it and yesterday I got a call saying they looked at my pulmonary function tests and my echocardiogram together and are seeing signs of mild pulmonary hypertension and signs of mild emphysema. That has me a little more freaked out that just plain ol' asthma.

I'm seeing a pulmonologist in early March and I'll know more but in the mean time, no half marathon. I can exercise but nothing 'extreme' like 13 miles. For now. I'm hoping to be able to downgrade to the 5k which I'm allowed to do so at least I won't lose my money and will have something to look forward to.

Maybe this is why I'm struggling to get past a 5k. Maybe I will be able to do more when this is diagnosed and treated?

For the first time (or maybe I'm just now realizing this) my body is holding me back from what I want to do. I don't just want to be skinny. I WANT to be a runner. I WANT to be that active, fit person who knows no limits. I have the energy and the mindset to do all of it and the body just can't.

My trainer said last night that she thinks I'm at a real turning point and positive place in my life where I can do some great things for myself. I'm not taking that lightly. I've got the tools in place. Between my yoga instructors and my trainer, I have an army of hot chicks working on me. I can be one of them if I take this seriously and keep working my ass off to pay for it all.

you look mahvelous....

2011-02-16T11:18:00.002-05:00

When I first started yoga I had a hard time looking myself in the mirrors that surround me. Our instructor always says to find your eyes in the mirror and focus on them. I don't want to look because in my mind I look SO much better. Last night I knew she was specifically talking to me when she said "find your eyes find your eyes find your eyes". My balance must be getting better because I found them and I looked. I really looked.

I'll tell ya, what I saw was a hundred million times better looking than the first disheartening look I too more than 6 months ago. My body has completely changed and I've barely lost a pound.

Last nights class was miserable. Too many people sucking up what little oxygen was in the room, too many men smelling of man feet, had to stand right in front of the humidifier etc. I was so nauseous from the smell I didn't do really well for the 2nd half but maybe last night was meant my time to appreciate my progress, even on a bad day.

Maybe, one day, the scale will move again.

Digging deep

2011-02-08T10:50:00.002-05:00

Sometimes I think I totally sell myself short on my athletic abilities. I never thought I was a "I can't do that" kind of person but I hold myself back sometimes. This is exactly why I hired a trainer. To push me beyond these limits I set for myself in my head. Did you guys know I could do a minute long plank? I sure didn't! I still couldn't believe it until I did it for the 2nd time yesterday. I'll report back on the plank progress when I get to 2 minutes!! :)

She is exactly what I was looking for. The perfect combination of butt kicking workout and a dose of encouragement and happy, me time. I look forward to going to her studio as much as yoga.

Speaking of yoga, I have forced myself to only go one night a week and pound the pavement the rest of the time. I've been putting in some serious miles and only had one small freak-out about the 1/2 marathon. I had read that participants had to keep a pace of 4 mph (which is not going to happen) but then the "worlds nicest ex-boyfriend" pointed out that the course was open for 7 hours and that old ladies with walkers could finish it in that amount of time. He's right and now I'm not going to worry (as much) and just do my very best. I may be last but I will finish it.

Things would be so much easier if only some more weight would come off. I'm considering a major shift in my diet...possibly going meat free for a while and see if that stirs up the metabolism a bit. It's worth a shot!

A new chapter

2011-01-31T10:11:00.003-05:00

I'm usually not the biggest fan of Mondays but today I'm feeling great. On Friday I met with a trainer who I immediately knew was the person for me. I'm starting today and I'm not even a little nervous because I'm SO ready to kick it up a notch.
I will work with her once a week, do yoga twice a week, and walk/run just about every day. I'm hoping by spring to be able to bike to my appointment with her. There is an ENORMOUS hill on the 2 mile route from my house to her studio which I WILL conquer one day... after the half marathon.
I think the hardest part will be keeping up with my cardio on days where I have my training or yoga. There aren't enough hours in the day as it is but I'm committed to keeping up this schedule.
The weather this weekend has a lot to do with my positive attitude. All it takes is a little sun and warmth to have me feeling energized and happy. My husband and I clocked 10 miles this weekend which put me over my goal of 15 for the week. I was sore but recovered really quickly every day. If I keep up my current pace, I should be able to complete the half marathon (running and walking) with about 45 minutes to spare in the 5 hour time limit. Not a lot of room for error but I'm a little less terrified now that I've picked up my pace just a little. I have to keep reminding myself that it's only 3/4 of one day of the 3-Day. I've done that 3 times. I've got this.

In case you missed it, here's a pic from Crys' blog. We went to Bikram together on Friday and it was a riot. Her post about it is worth a read!
Have an awesome week everyone.

wake-up call #3,756

2011-01-28T11:12:00.003-05:00

I found out yesterday, unofficially, that I have asthma. I've been suffering from allergies (itching and wheezing) for a while now and yesterday saw a respiratory therapist and went through an hours worth of tests. He says I have it and is sure the pulmonologist will confirm it. Of course I asked the usual questions... Is it because I smoked a pack a week (cigarettes and otherwise) back in the day? Is it because I'm too fat? Yes and yes. He said that there are probably many reasons it's flared up recently but the weight is the main factor. He was no skinny thang himself so luckily was very understanding about how hard it can be.

As someone who doesn't sit around and feel sorry for myself, I'm doing something about it. I have exercised and ate well every day this week and in one hour, I'm meeting with someone who I think will be a perfect personal trainer. It will be hard to afford it with the yoga and gym but it will be cheaper than all this medication in the long run.

Going to yoga tonight with Crys. I'm super excited about that.

Oh and I lost 3 lbs. this week. Almost on to fresh pounds...

mid-week motivation

2011-01-26T10:44:00.002-05:00

I feel about a million times better after finally getting back to my yoga class after a week off. It was a grueling one too. Our normally sweet instructor got all drill instructor on our asses last night. It was probably a good thing because mine needed a kickin'. At one point she said "if I don't hear sweat hitting the mats like rain it's not hot enough in here." I was warm from head to toe all night after that. Fabulous!

Today I owe myself 4 miles on the treadmill at a lunchtime workout. I've decided I'm not going to beat myself up for not doing cardio on my yoga days but I'm going to set a mileage goal for the week and stick to it. This week it's 15 miles. Next week will be a little more. This half marathon is coming up fast.

I started the day with a big bowl of steel cut oats, munching on an apple and string cheese before I workout at noon, then a light lunch of some vegetable soup. Big stir fry with a tiny bit of brown rice for dinner and that should do me for the day.

There's a new show on A&E that's based on Intervention called "HEAVY". It's Better than the Biggest Loser in my opinion. Mostly because there's more information and less selling of Biggest Loser products and product placement. It's on On Demand in some areas. I'm looking forward to watching the rest of them this season. Check it out if you need a little motivation.

Hope everyone is having a great week! As always I appreciate all the support!

How yoga is like gastric bypass...only more expensive

2011-01-25T09:55:00.003-05:00

It's been about 6 months now since I started going to my hot yoga classes and y'all know how much I love it but there's an interesting thing happening with my eating patterns that I'm just starting to notice.

Because the room is 110 - 115 degrees and the class is such an intense workout, it's something I have to really prepare for. One of the instructors said that the day before the class is just as important as the day of. I'm always mindful of what I'm eating and drinking the day before and especially the day of. If I eat like crap I will throw up. Simple as that. Kinda like a gastric bypass.

I'm trying to figure if adding another day of class is worth it but it might be a band-aid on the real problem which is putting myself in that frame of mind EVERY DAY. I don't know where that desire to treat my body well goes on the other days. I'm still not getting enough cardio and even though I'd rather do yoga, I know I need to mix it up.

I heard that weird looking doctor say to one of the contestants on the Biggest Loser that she would have to work out 90 minutes a day, six days a week for the rest of her life to keep from gaining her weight back. That's what I did back when I lost 100 pounds. That's what it takes. I HAVE to get back there.

The road ahead

2011-01-24T09:50:00.003-05:00

Life is still busy and about to get busier.

I promised myself that this year was going to be about progress not survival and that is taking much more work than I could have imagined.

I've been blessed with a new source of steady work that I will really enjoy doing and will finally give me the money I desperately need to fix some things around my house. The problem is I'm sacrificing every second of ME time, including working out. I've been getting up at 5:45, working until 8, going to my part time job, coming home at 1:00 and working until 7 or 8. My only option is to quit this ugly habit of working before sunrise and get back to going to the gym by 6. It's the only thing that's going to give me the energy to do all this work.

Last Monday I went to the doctor for what I think is an allergy (lots of itching and wheezing) and she drained a tiny cyst I had on my side that wasn't even bothering me in the slightest. Suddenly it became a raging infection and I ended up back in the office mid-week in serious pain. Luckily they fixed me up quickly and gave me some antibiotics but it's amazing how much that derailed me for the week. I wasn't able to bend at all so yoga was out and the little bit of sweating I did while vacuuming burned like crazy. Today is my last day of no exercise per doctors orders and I will not stop moving the rest of this week.

No exercise + winter = crazy

A week of reflection

2011-01-14T11:10:00.002-05:00

Nothing gets your mind rolling like being stuck in your house for almost a week! I've gone out for food and that is all. I feel like a big. fat. blob.

I'm over the ice and snow. There has been no gym open. No yoga classes. Not even a prayer of being able to walk more than a few feet outside. Sure, I could have used my fancy elliptical trainer but instead I stuffed my face.

I am an addict.

I seriously used a snowstorm as an excuse to eat like a pig for more than 5 days in a row.

I could dwell on it all weekend and start again Monday but I'm picking myself back up today. Yoga studio is open and I'm going at 4:30. There is no more chocolate or potato chips in the house and it will stay that way.

Love from crazyland.

Gearing up

2011-01-09T12:33:00.002-05:00

It's a crazy day here in the South gearing up for a really big winter storm.

We just got back from the grocery store (along with everyone else in the state) and got the supplies to make white chicken chili along with a loaf of Natures Own Double Fiber wheat bread. We're set!! We lose power so often in these situations and I didn't want to take the risk of not having anything we can heat up on the grill.

Things are going REALLY well over here. I'm happier than I've been in a while which I attribute to my fabulous friends and family, yoga and lots of paying work. I'm back to my pre-Christmas weight but I still need to get some running miles in. The half marathon is coming up quick and I'm still not going much further than a 5k.

Hoping everyone is doing well!

yet another New Years Eve post

2010-12-31T12:41:00.003-05:00

I've never been a big fan of New Years Eve. I never thought about why until I started blogging and I realized that it's because I never felt good about what I accomplished throughout the year. Personally and professionally. This year is a little different. I have done a lot this year and I'm sitting here with this weird sense of what might be pride.

I made a decision last year at this time that 2010 would be about survival. When I lost my job I gave myself a few days to be wreck but then I got right back to work figuring out how I was going to pay the mortgage. I've tried to apply that "if it sucks do something about it" attitude toward everything I've done for the whole year and it worked.

I seriously just took a break to wander in the kitchen and take a bite of a "crunchie" my husband brought me back from Scotland...I digress...

I didn't lose as much weight as I wanted to which I mentioned the other day but the pounds I did lose made a big difference. I tried things I was afraid of 30 pounds ago like yoga, riding a scooter and flying down the hill on a sled on our very rare white Christmas in the south. I'm proud of that. Again with the pride thing.

2010 was about survival, 2011 is all about progress. Personally, physically and professionally. I resolve to grow my business and shrink myself. I will push myself out of my comfort zone and attend networking events. I will feed my body what it needs to exercise more than ever before.
I have no excuse. I have my own business and I have no kids.

I feel like crap today. I've gained about 6 pounds over the last few weeks from eating sugar and carbs like an addict. To continue my "if it sucks do something about it" mission into the new year, I have a yoga class at 4:30 and I literally can't wait. It's only 1:00 and I have my stuff packed. I don't think I have ever worked out on New Years Eve.

Finally I'd like to give a shout out to my dear friend Cat who has faithfully kept a blog for an entire year posting a picture every day. I'm so incredibly proud of you for sticking to it!

Thanks to everyone for being such a huge support to me during this crazy year. Great things are ahead so stay tuned. Happy New Year my friends!

Christmas day at my moms house in Franklin, NC

Tales from the drive-thru

2010-12-22T11:11:00.002-05:00

I wasn't going to write about this. Mostly because I wanted to pretend it didn't happen...partly because I now know some of the people who read my blog. But maybe I need to acknowledge it. The proverbial slap-in-the face wake-up-call kinda thing.

I was in the drive thru at McDonald's yesterday. Don't worry, I was only there for a skinny latte. Then it happened. The 350+ pound woman at the window asked me when I was due. I said "what?" and she asked again if I was pregnant.

In all my years of fatness, this has never happened before. I've read numerous blogs about that particular question being the last straw for some.

I'm devastated by it and I wish I wasn't. I've been so incredibly happy and grateful this holiday season and I'm trying not to let this ruin it all. I did lose 30 pounds this year and I've been trying to talk myself into believing that's good enough but it's not. There's so much more work to be done and I'm sitting here writing after just having had a handful of m&ms I didn't need. No exercise so far today because I was out late. Eating and drinking.

All I can do is try to use this for good and motivate myself to finish what I started.

doing well and doing good

2010-12-21T10:01:00.001-05:00

I know I have not been a faithful blogger lately but I’ve been so busy and I don’t want my blog time to become a chore. Things are winding down on the business front for the year and now I can take some time to relax and enjoy the things I like to do.

I’m doing well on the exercise front and up and down on the eating front. T his time of year is so hard. We all know that so I’m not going to dwell on it. Yoga has been a life saver. I’ve been going 3 days a week which I know is great exercise but I’m not doing much else right now. I need to be running as well! To keep myself sane I promised myself I would do some form of movement every day through the end of the year. Yoga, running, swimming, whatever.

On to the doing good. I have had an amazing year despite the fact that I lost my job a year ago. I was terrified at first but I busted my ass and made it. I decided to pay it forward and do as much good as I can during the Holidays. It’s kept me busy but very, VERY fulfilled.

I will be catching up on my blog reading. I hope everyone is having a great week.

Friday!!

2010-12-03T09:15:00.007-05:00

After a brutal week of workouts and super clean eating, I lost 6 pounds! Still not back at my lowest but getting really close. I'd like to get on to some "fresh" pounds but next week is going to be a challenge.

My best friend from high school is turning 40 and decided we should celebrate our birthdays together so she's coming to visit on Wednesday. I'm thrilled to have her but she's a single mom and when she gets a break from her kids she likes to party. I don't blame her at all but I'm on a roll and not in the eating and drinking non-stop frame of mind. I'm trying to plan some active activities but we will probably be eating out a lot. With some careful planning I can probably maintain but losing might be a stretch. I WILL leave her at home as to not miss yoga class!!

There were many victories this week. I did two 75 minute Bikram classes this week. One night is was pouring rain and freezing, and last night I was so sore from running but I went anyway. I even got compliments on my progress from the instructors both nights. I tracked and measured/ weighed everything I put in my mouth and never made it over 1200 calories. The one goal for this week which I thought would be the hardest wasn't at all. I gave up my evening snack which is usually a 1o0 calorie pack and a glass of milk. I had to change things up and that was an obvious thing that had to go. It all seems to have paid off on the scale. Plus, my skinny (er) jeans aren't cutting me in half at the waist anymore.

I can't think of a better way to celebrate a great week than dropping off all of this at the Can-A-Thon in a couple of hours...

This is a big event in Atlanta every year and this is the first time I've participated. My mom told us all she didn't want a Christmas gift but wanted us to do something charitable instead. My sister and I will drop it off and have someone take a picture of us and that will be my gift to our mom. I even made a sign to hold up. I will post some pictures over the weekend. All of this was only $90 at Aldi and that's a small price to pay when there are more people needing help than ever before. I tried to get mostly healthy stuff so there are 150+ cans in there of collards, veggies, chili, tuna, sweet potatoes and soup. There is even some not-as-healthy ravioli for the kids.

Have a wonderful weekend everyone!

December? Really?

2010-12-01T07:34:00.003-05:00

Can anyone believe it's the last month of the year already? I turn 41 in a week and it seems like 40 was yesterday.

I've kicked things up a notch in the fat fight in hopes of spending New Years Eve proud of what I've done (for a change). I've lost 30 pounds this year so far and would like to add another 10 to that number. Even that's 60 pounds short of my true weight loss goals but I'm choosing to focus on the fact that I've lost it and it's stayed off.

It's been a great week so far. I've tracked, weighed and/or measured everything that I've put in my mouth and have been drinking a ton of water. I felt the benefits of that immediately at my 75 minute Bikram class last night. I made it through the whole class with no break and held one set of "standing bow pose" for the full minute. Ummm, I don't look quite like this when I do it (yet!) but I know I did a good job because I got a huge smile from my teacher. I think I'm a bit of a project for her which isn't a bad thing :) I don't know why I haven't looked it up before but according to most calorie burning calculators I've used, this class burns 1200 calories. I'm going to try to afford two a week for a while.

This morning was absolutely freezing so I decided to wait until lunchtime for my run. I will decide whether it's an outside or gym day when the time comes. Outside would be preferable!

If you want to be inspired, check out these weight loss stories on Dr. Oz. It's in 3 parts and all are worth watching!
The Secrets of the Skinny, Pt. 1

Have a great day everyone!

Binge and Purge

2010-11-29T09:48:00.002-05:00

The Binge:
As per usual with me, Thanksgiving was just just one day, it was more like 7. I ate and drank A LOT. I also didn't do a lot of exercise (though I did make it to a 75 minute Bikram class).

The Purge:
I've been letting my clean eating slide little by little which is why I haven't been losing weight with all the exercise I'm doing. Over the years I've learned that the only time I lose is when I'm tracking and following a plan so that's exactly what I'm doing from now until the end of the year.

To set myself up for success I've gotten rid of everything in the house that has any white flour or sugar. Even the Fiber One bars. I even cleaned my closet and organized all my workout gear. I don't normally work out on Mondays got up this morning and walked my 3 mile route. I had no motivation to run but at least I got a good start on the week.

I hope everyone had an awesome Thanksgiving. Here's to a great week ahead!

STARVING!

2010-11-17T11:09:00.003-05:00

I don't know what my deal is but I have been absolutely ravenous this week. Luckily there is nothing in the house that is really dangerous but I'm still managing to eat too much. This is real hunger too, not just boredom. Lightheadedness and all!

My weight loss has not been great despite all of my exercising which means I really need to do better on the nutrition front. This little spell is not helping. I haven't switched over to oatmeal for the winter because I wanted to eat what was left of the Trader Joe's O's but I may have to let those go and see if the oats will help fill me up.

Any thoughts blog buddies? What do you eat that really satisfies and fills you up?

Time to brag on my husband

2010-11-15T09:34:00.004-05:00

As you all know already, I have the worlds sweetest, most supportive, Scottish husband in the world. I'm a lucky girl and I won't bore you with all that again ;)

I wanted to take a minute to give him some credit for all the hard work he's done since we started our new exercise routine in January. He has lost 30 pounds and his progress pictures are so amazing I had to share. Did I mention how cute he is too????

My husband knows about my blog but doesn't read it because he says it should remain a personal thing for me. He was really honored though when I asked him if I could post his pictures. He motivates me every single day.

I also hope that he can be some inspiration for anyone who's feeling like they can't do it. He still manages to have fun eating and drinking beer. Just less of everything combined with A LOT more exercise. It really is the winning combination!

5K Sunday

2010-11-14T10:53:00.002-05:00

I don't normally do a blog post on the weekend but I'm feeling quite proud of myself for getting up and doing a 5k with my husband at 8:00 this morning. Running is still hard but it's getting just a tiny bit easier every day. So far I'm on track for my 15 mile a week goal.

As I was running around my usual course I was thinking about how just a year ago when I lost my job how hard it was to walk the dogs around the block. Back then I couldn't even dream of even walking as far as I RUN now.

This post is to serve as a reminder to myself that while the pounds are coming off slowly, my fitness progress is something to be really proud of. Before I know it, March will be here and I'll be crossing the finish line of that half marathon - come hell or high water :)

pretty cool

2010-11-11T07:46:00.004-05:00

Today was my first run with my Nike plus attachment for the iPod. Being a visual person, I always enjoy seeing my efforts laid out in front of me . This is what this morning looked like

I'm so glad I decided to start running outside. I love being alone with my thoughts as I watch the sun come up over the golf course. Not sure how cold it will have to get before I'm back in the gym but we'll see! I'll enjoy it while it lasts.

A few people have been commenting about being brave and going to yoga and I've been thinking a lot about that lately. Sure it was really hard the first time and yes, I'm surely the fattest person there. I can see myself in the mirror. I know I look ridiculous at times but as I see it, I would look a lot more ridiculous on my couch watching Oprah surrounded by candy wrappers. All I can say is, if you have a desire to do something, do it. Same with the pool. If you think people are looking at you they aren't. I've learned that fit people have respect for people who are trying. No matter what you look like in a bathing suit, a tank top or a crow pose.

Hope everyone is having a great week. I so appreciate those who are hanging in there and still reading this through all my ups and downs!!!

So far so good

2010-11-10T11:34:00.003-05:00

It's been a good week so far. I went for my first outside run in a while on Monday and did pretty well considering there were lots of hills. I bought a Nike Plus for my iPod (because I refuse to switch to AT&T to get an iPhone with the GPS so I have to go old school) Now I can track my progress outside which will be fun.

It would have gotten used for the first time this morning if it weren't for the hot Pranakriya yoga class I took last night. I'm am extremely sore from head to toe. The only thing I might manage later is a dog walk. Hoping tomorrow won't be worse!!

I have been trying out different classes in the hot room and so far this one was the most ass kicking of all. I managed a forearm stand (against the wall of course!) for at least 30 seconds. Being upside down is liberating! I'm thankful for my teacher who is SO encouraging and calls me by name. Her interest really makes me want to keep practicing.

I'm proud of myself for making time for my exercise despite my 12 hour workdays. Sometimes it's the hardest thing in the world to do but it really does help in so many ways. Off to eat some soup and do a little stretch if I can even stand up! Have a great day everyone!

Thanks again Al!

2010-11-08T10:10:00.004-05:00

There's nothing like a little inspiration on a Monday morning! I saw Al on the today show this morning being pampered after finishing the NYC marathon and I'm feeling really inspired again.
It's too bad I'm sitting at my desk because I would go run right now! Al you are my hero.

I never run on a Monday morning and now I wish I had. I got some walking in but it didn't really do it for me. I have so much to do to get ready for the half marathon in March and while I've made great progress, I'm nowhere near where I need to be. The plan is to kick it up a notch this week, leave the treadmill behind and take it outside. Maybe a change of scenery will do me some good.

The weekend was so fun. I had a blast with my husband and blew off all my work. I will pay for that today but one can only work so much. The only bummer was I didn't get to have dinner with Tammy as planned. My upstairs shower was leaking through the ceiling downstairs and my brother-in-law was coming over to have a look at it. Turns out it's nothing more than having to re-grout the shower which I will do over Thanksgiving weekend. Good times :)

Good luck to everyone this week. I'll report on my outside running progress later in the week. Luckily we have some fabulous weather on tap.

Thanks Al Roker, my neighbor Jason, Shelley and all my other runner friends who inspire me every day!!! I will do this and I will make you proud!!

just okay

2010-11-05T07:34:00.004-04:00

I can't believe how fast this week has gone by. Before I know it, Christmas will be here! I've realized I have entered into a new phase of adulthood - buying gifts early. What a concept!!

I did just okay this week. I ate pretty well and did a Bikram class and some running. Both seriously kicked my ass because I've been slacking. Just okay doesn't cut it because I gained a pound this week. I blame it on hormones (oh and the pizza we ate last night after another 12 hour work day)!

Back to Body Pump for me on Saturday and some sort of outdoor run walk combo on Sunday. Lots of social obligations happening this weekend so I need to earn my fun :) I'm desperate to go to Bikram tonight. The 4:30 class is a lovely way to start the weekend but I cannot spend the money to go twice a week. I will save it for the Tuesday night class with my favorite teacher.

Have a great weekend everyone!

November 1st: Step away from the candy...

2010-11-01T12:04:00.002-04:00

It's gone. It's out of the house. I ate so much of it that I didn't even want any more.

I'm finally going back to a more normal schedule and plan on a great week of butt kicking workouts. Combined with the meal planning and cooking I've done, we should be in for a good week.

I'm looking forward to catching up on my blogging. In the mean time, here are my cute dogs!!
Have a great week everyone!

back to reality

2010-10-19T14:51:00.001-04:00

In case anyone was wondering where I've been, I finally got a few days at the beach! I haven't been on a vacation in a year and a half and desperately needed it. I was at total burnout stage but I seem to have come back with a renewed energy.

I've managed to maintain my weight loss but my running progress has suffered due to not running. Imagine that! Eating in Florida was pretty much flawless since I had nothing but grouper, oysters and sushi. The drinking however, pretty much non-stop. I'm thankful that doesn't happen very often.

Other than that, I've been working full time at the agency and still working on my own company projects which usually amounts to about 12 hours of work a day- 7 days a week. I'm thankful for the income so I can't complain too much.

I got an encouraging email from the worlds nicest ex-boyfriend asking how my training is coming along for the half marathon and the honest answer is that it isn't. It was the kick in the butt I needed to get back at it. Funny how quickly you can forget just how good it feels though getting up at 5:15 never seems to get any easier.

I'm going to try a yoga class at my gym tonight to ease back in. I've been enjoying Bikram so much but it's an expensive habit so I can really only do that once a week. I figured I should just try it at the Y and if it's terrible, I won't go again. No lavender scented cold towels there! :( Then it's back to running in the morning.

I'm looking forward to getting back to blogging more regularly and spending some time catching up on what y'all have been up to. Hope everyone has a great week!!

namaste

2010-10-04T16:17:00.002-04:00

I haven't been around much this past week because of endless piles of work combined with social obligations out the wazoo. That makes not a lot of time for the gym and way to much eating and drinking.

It really wore me down to I started my week with an amazing hot Vinyasa yoga class at 6 am to detox. I swear, if I was a celebrity or just really wealthy, I would do this every single day. I was coming out of the building just as the sun was rising on a really chilly morning and I could still smell the relaxing lavender from the cold towel you get lovingly placed on your face at the end.

This was a new class for me and I was nervous because it's a bit more complicated and intense than Bikram. I think I did pretty well for a fat newbie and even managed a hand stand (against the wall of course!) What a fun and freeing feeling. Speaking of freeing feelings, I wore a tank top for the first time ever in public (if you count the yoga studio at 6am as public) I have just made up my mind that I deserve to be comfortable and I've seen fatter women in worse things. I enjoy the class more when I'm not paying attention to how I look and just moving through the poses doing as much as I can do. Sweet little Astrid, the instructor, has been really helpful making me feel comfortable there. I can't imagine being able to do some of the things she does with her body though!!

I'm running intervals the rest of the week and will attempt another 20 minute run on Friday. I'm hoping this one is better than the last now that the dreaded heat has finally gone.

Getting up at 5:15 is tough and I'm fading fast. This was a boring post due to lack of energy (and brain cells) Hope everyone has a great week!!

a little rough patch

2010-09-27T10:13:00.006-04:00

It's been a little bit of a frustrating time for me and I have to admit that I've been letting it get the best of me this past week. I've been making all kinds of excuses not to work out and slipping back into some bad eating habits. I know from experience that these are dangerous times.

Luckily I'm aware of it and ready to take control before it gets worse. I had a nice relaxing weekend at my moms in the mountains, the temperature has finally gone out of the 90's and I feel a little more like I can pull myself out of this.

As hard as I try I will never understand the way my mind works. I haven't lost a pound in over a month so what does my brain want to do? Give up. I never give up on anything else so what makes this different? I'm even showing some signs of jealousy towards my husband who has lost 20 pounds and is running 4.5 miles at a time. Everyone tells him how good he looks while I nod my head in agreement but can't help thinking how I've done twice as much and eaten half as much without any progress at all. Don't get my wrong I'm SO happy for him but sometimes it's hard to be a cheerleader when I'm feeling this way. My mom said I looked "glowing and healthy" but that's because I've wiped away the top layer of skin with my incessant sweating.

A week (or so) ago I did my 20 minute run and I haven't run since. It was so hard and I didn't feel well after and I think it scared me a little. It may have been the heat that got to me even though I was in the gym. The longer I go the worse it will be so I'm going to do some intervals tomorrow and see how I feel. I've also got my yoga class tomorrow night and I'm really excited to go again. I do see the irony in that I'm complaining about the heat but choose to do yoga in a 105 degree room. It's just so relaxing and if I close my eyes I can pretend I'm at the beach :)

Enough with the whining. It's a new week. Hope everyone has a good one!

I leave you with 2 great dog pictures from my weekend in the mountains.

Ups and ups.

2010-09-17T14:37:00.003-04:00

I'm only going to say this once and not dwell on it because I already shed enough tears over it this morning. I GAINED 2 pounds again this week after 8.5 hours of work outs. I wasn't flawless with my eating this week - had Chick Fil A one day and Moe's one day but neither of those should be a problem. Maybe it was the 12-15 hour days of work I put in. The only thing I can think to do is to really start keeping track of calories again. I thought I had that down but I guess not.

In other news, I JUST (about 20 minutes ago) finished my first TWENTY MINUTE RUN. 1.25 miles without stopping. I try to be honest here in my blog and truthfully, it was hell. It was neither enjoyable nor rewarding but now I think it's starting to sink in and I'm quite proud. I'm really looking forward to it getting easier though. Losing some pounds would help (crap... I said I wasn't going to speak of that again!)

Bikram Yoga on Tuesday was fabulous and I can't wait to go back. I was by far the fattest person there but 3 people left and I sailed through it. Someone asked me how I could stand it and I said that there's something so empowering about watching your own sweat pour off you onto the mat. Plus my skin looks awesome from it :) It's an expensive habit but once a week should be okay for the budget for now.

When we were leaving the yoga studio, there was a personal training studio across the hall. There were 2 people working out and they looked absolutely miserable. I wanted to walk in there and say "y'all are never going to get anywhere with that sh*tty attitude!" Of course I would never really say that but today I realized I need to keep practicing what I preach. In good times and in bad.

Have a great weekend everyone.

first day jitters

2010-09-14T09:47:00.002-04:00

It was hard to get up this morning for the second day in a row. Yesterday I got up and went back to bed. I needed a morning off but I went for a swim and a 3 mile walk later in the day because I really missed that morning workout.

Today was a struggle again but only because I didn't sleep very well. The dogs were having some sort of power play between their beds and ours which is unusual. I was also nervous about starting week 5 of couch to 5k and even more nervous because tonight I start Bikram yoga again. I promised my sister when I lost 20 pounds I'd go with her and I'm going to keep my promise.

For anyone that doesn't know, Bikram is usually a 90 minute yoga class done in 105 degree room. This is the third thing in the trilogy of activities that helped me to lose 100 pounds before. Running. Body Pump. Bikram Yoga.

Did I mention that after this class tonight I will have spent 2 and a half hours exercising today??

I shouldn't have been nervous about week 5 of C25k. Today was "only" three 5-minute runs so I did week one for the 2nd half hour. I was dripping wet but I felt really strong. Two 8-minute runs tomorrow then the next day will be my first 20 minute run. If I can make it through this I'll have run longer than I ever have.

Lots of firsts this week.

Eating wise still doing really well. I had a little too much dark chocolate and 6 of those damn 2 bite brownies but when I think about what a weekend consisted of before it's huge progress. I've really enjoyed cooking again and it seems both my husband I like my food better than a restaurant so it makes it easy to be really good and not feel deprived of anything. Part of it is falling into a good routine where we BOTH do a ton of prep work on a Sunday to get ready for the week. If you have a significant other, I recommend putting them to work chopping things up even if you are a control freak :) It's ALL about the planning.

So between working 2 jobs, working out, yoga, chiropractor and cooking and shopping for every meal, I have very little time left but I'm okay because I have the energy to deal with all of it from treating myself right. Huge progress people!!

non-scale progress

2010-09-10T07:59:00.002-04:00

I've come to the conclusion that there's going to be 1-2 weeks per month that the scale does not cooperate so I'm just going to accept that because I'm a woman, it is what it is. Up 2 pounds for the week. It's all water retention. I still rock so I'm focusing on all the non-scale victories for the week :)

1. All week I have been doing week 4 of couch to 5k. I repeated this week due to my sickness the week before. I found it too easy so I did week one for the second half hour. Every day. Week 5 starts Monday.

2. I made myself take a day off from the gym today after 7 days in a row again. I'm missing it terribly!

3. I have elbows and I think I see my knees.

4. The armrest in my car is now where I rest my arm instead of it being the barrier between my side fat and the passenger seat.

I hope everyone has a great weekend. Tammy, Crys and I are all meeting for a workout then a trip to the farmers market. Can't wait to catch up with my girls!

so this is what they call living...

2010-09-06T17:04:00.002-04:00

These are the times I wish I could bottle up all the motivation, pride and sheer joy to save for a crappy day or sell it and make a bazillion dollars so I don't have to work on a holiday. I can already hear the infomercial in my head!

In the past, by the end of a holiday weekend, I was tired and bloated and bitchy about having to "start my diet again tomorrow". This time I enjoyed my holiday weekend in a completely different way as if I was in the body of a different person. I loved every minute of it.

It all kicked off with proper planning. I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that as soon as I could smell all the grills in the neighborhood, I would be craving all the foods that are synonymous with an American summer holiday. I was totally prepared and it worked.

Friday night I made a gorgeous 4oz grass fed beef burger on a small whole wheat bun with sweet potato fries and coleslaw with very little mayo. It was perfect if I do say so myself.

Saturday morning I went to Body Pump and was so excited to be back after a week of not going to the gym due to the sickness. I did better than ever before increasing all my weight and managing all but 4 of the lunges. Maybe next time I'll be able to say I did them all. As if that weren't enough, we walked 5 miles round trip to book festival after I got home. I purposely took the route by the Chick-Fil-A so I could stop and have my 300 calorie grilled chicken sandwich to prepare for the onslaught of corn dogs and other fried delights at the festival. After that I had 2 beers which was more than enough to fuel me for the walk home :) I stopped and bought $40 worth of socks at the running store too. Body pump, 5 mile walk, running store. All in one day. Who would have thought.

Saturday night I made very healthy shrimp fajitas for us and the neighbors and ended up overdoing it a little on the guacamole but managed to stick with 2 margaritas. The planned amount! Fajitas are a great way to feel like you are pigging out on mexican food but you have to watch the tortillas. Trader joes has a new small tortilla with 45 calories and 7 grams of fiber. Two is more than enough. They are a Godsend.

Sunday I did just about everything but the work I needed to do but managed a good three mile walk and some serious house cleaning while procrastinating. For some reason I was extra hungry all day so I decided to read to try to keep my mind off of it but of course it's a book involving lots of incredible descriptions of food but I'll save that for another post. We repeated Friday's dinner because It was that good and we already had everything.

This morning, I ran farther outside than I have yet. We did our 3 mile route and I managed more than half of that running. It was REALLY fun and I didn't feel like I was going to die once. A woman driving by gave me a thumbs up. I could have kissed her. Since I've embraced the fat girl running, I don't mind people noticing me. I owe that to Al and his sense of humor about it all.

Tonight is grilled pizzas on pitas from the Farmers Market which was planned because we usually order a pizza at the end of a holiday weekend binge. Not this time suckers :)

My dream about running was not just a one time thing. It's been a recurring dream now and for some reason it's helping me. In my dream I'm running with no consequence. No breathing heavy pain or heavy legs, just the freeing feeling of moving down the road quickly. I have a strange feeling it has something to do with my dad giving me encouragement from above.

I know this is long and probably mostly boring but to sum it all up, I think I now know what it's like to feel alive and I'm not sure I ever did before. I'm seeing everything from a different point of view. My body is changing but my mind has had a total makeover. I saw things in the neighborhood I've never seen in 6 years of living. I WANTED to walk 5 miles on a gorgeous day with my husband instead of watching HGTV and wishing I had the energy to do something. You couldn't pry the smile off my face right now.

Holiday Friday Quickie

2010-09-03T11:00:00.002-04:00

Just wanted to drop in to say...
1. I've officially entered the 220's - a new decade for moi!!!
2. I'm not sure who this person is I've become - the one that is planning healthy meals and lots of activity for the long weekend. I even had a dream about running!
3. I hope everyone has a fabulous holiday weekend!!

A new low

2010-09-02T07:55:00.002-04:00

It feels so good to be feeling better. It's been a year and a half since I've been sick and I forgot how much it sucked!

The good part? I weighed in a day early and lost 6 pounds this week!! 230 today. 16 pounds in a month (and a day). I can't wait to see the 220's again.

Leave it to me to do this AFTER the challenge ended! I'm still so proud of my friend Crys for winning. She lost 15 pounds in a month while traveling. She's a freaking rock star.

I'm trying not to get too excited about the loss this week because I haven't been exercising and I know I've lost some muscle I've worked so hard to build up. I was going to wait until tomorrow to go back to the gym but I'm considering a lunch time swim today because I miss exercising. To me that attitude is even more important than the pounds lost.

Hope everyone is having a great week!! Long weekend ahead!!!

end of challenge weigh in

2010-08-31T17:10:00.004-04:00

236 this morning which is no loss in the last 2 weeks but that's 10 total for the challenge. I'm pretty pleased with that! Also, my BMI is down 3%. I haven't seen that move in quite a while!

Right now I'm sick as a dog with a cold I caught at a kids birthday party and just came back from a trip to the doc with a chest x-ray and 3 kinds of meds. I'm not dying so that's good - even though it feels like it!

While I was there I was venting my frustrations about not being able to get below 235 and she decided to check my thyroid (again!) and this time check for insulin resistance. We'll see what happens with that! I've had thyroid symptoms since I was a teenager but it's always come back normal or borderline. I also know that there are different tests that can be done so I'm going to push for that if this latest round doesn't turn anything up.

I haven't had any exercise since Saturday and I strangely miss it. The doc told to wait until I can breathe again so hopefully by Thursday I'll be back at it because I've been making some good progress. I even managed to up my weights a bit in the Body Pump class and do all the squats. I know I will feel even more victorious when I can make it through the 4 minutes of lunges! oy....

I hope everyone is having a great week so far. I'm off for some more couch time while it lasts!! :)

week 4 challenge weigh in

2010-08-27T09:40:00.004-04:00

I really didn't even want to post today but all the amazing comments I got on yesterdays post made me realize I have to keep going through good and bad. If it wasn't for this blog, I may have given it all up today.

I gained a freakin pound but as the oh so wise Mr. Sh*t told me, "know that what you're doing is better than what you're NOT doing (binging, slothing)". So I did exactly what he said. He's kinda like my male Oprah. I do whatever he tells me to do. I'm sure he'll be thrilled with that comparison ;)

Yesterday after my post I did go to the pool but not for an easy swim by any means. I rocked 40 laps in 45 minutes. At one point there was a "real" swimmer girl who kept looking at me and I almost said out loud "I'm not racing you so so stop looking at me you dumb $*%#!". I calmed myself down and remembered I was there to change my mood and not take it out on some girl who dared look at me. I swear I'm not a mean person but sometimes....grrrr. I felt awesome when I finished and too a long soak in the hot tub even though I had a ton of work to do.

My reaction this morning was downright stupid. My first thoughts were along the lines of "I can eat like crap and gain weight so I might as well" and so on. Later when my husband saw my tears and reminded me how much better I said I felt. My reply was "well what I really feel is tired, sore, sad and pissed of at my stupid sister who woke me up with a stupid drunk phone call after I'd gone to bed twice this week."

I ALMOST didn't go this morning. I still had tears in my eyes as I was staring at the moon getting in the car. But I went because I knew everyone was cheering me on. My husband and my blog friends are my biggest fans and I'm not letting them down. I did a pretty kick-ass half hour of c25k week 4 and then another half hour of incline intervals walking. I managed 3.25 miles in an hour which means my time is improving ever so slightly.

Speaking of my husband, he has lost 15 pounds now and I'm so proud of him. He will be in onederland by next week. I'm glad he's seeing progress because it's been a little hard for him to adjust to drinking very little beer and only having potatoes once a week :)

The point of all of this is to get my mind to the point where "going back" is out of the question. Where I don't want to eat like crap and sit on the couch. I'm getting there.

This is where it gets tough

2010-08-26T11:26:00.003-04:00

Well it seems I've already hit my first plateau which happened to coincide with my 1940's plaster kitchen ceiling falling down. $1600 to replace. That's the family price! Ironically it's the same price as a trip to Scotland which I was planning for Christmas. Looks like now my husband will go without me (again) and I'll stay home and bask in my modern day drywall kitchen ceiling. You can probably hear my heavy sigh from wherever you are reading this :)

The scale has my mind all messed up this week. Even though the official weigh in for the challenge isn't until tomorrow, I've been checking all week and I've somehow gained. I'm eating like a saint and doing an hour and 30 minutes a day of cardio.

No worries though, I'm not giving up. I just need to recognize when I'm feeling weak and get it out there.

Yesterday could have been really bad. I had a meeting in a particular part of town that I used to love to go to because our beloved drive-in, the Varsity Jr. is right there. It's the perfect place to sit in the car and gorge on the greasiest of chili dogs and pimento cheeseburgers (oh and the fried peach pies). I never thought I'd say this but thanks to the City of Atlanta zoning department, they just closed over the weekend and I avoided at least a 2,000 calorie disaster. Luckily the main location is ridiculous crowded and difficult to get to so I think my biggest temptation in the ATL is now gone for good.

Even my workout yesterday felt crappy. I was sore and tired and my legs felt like I had ankle weights on. Then we went to a concert last night and now my entire body hurts from jumping around to some seriously good Ska music. My left hip has been sore during my runs but today they are both on fire so I'm finally going to go to a chiropractor about it. It's not unbearable but it would be nice if it wasn't there at all! I'm sure being a fat person running isn't helping.

I'm off to the pool in a few for a gentle swim in hopes of improving my mood and my aching bones. Trying to treat myself to things that make me feel good that don't involve food and/or shopping.

I'm hoping that I at least stay the same for tomorrows weigh-in instead of having to post a gain in the challenge. I will not let that piece 0' crap scale beat me. I HAVE TO keep going. I'm a half-marathon participant now and those people don't just give up :)

no turning back now!

2010-08-24T10:25:00.009-04:00

I started week 4 of couch to 5k today after a full day off yesterday (aside from a 20 minute dog walk!). For some reason I was really nervous and doubting I could do it. Probably because this is the point where I stopped the last time. I did really well considering it was a full 16 minutes of running although I couldn't do my additional 30 minutes of incline interval walking. My legs just weren't having it and I'm sure tomorrow will be a little easier.

I'm (still) so motivated and full of energy which is a good thing

because....

as of this morning

I'm a registered participant of the Georgia Half Marathon.

I looked closely at the route for the first time this morning and at this point can't even really fathom the distance even though the course is through all familiar territory. I just have to put all fears aside and convince myself I will be able to do this by March. It's fun to have a huge goal but utterly terrifying at the same time.

I've been eating great as well and seeing big changes in my body, though not as much on the (damn) scale. I blame that on my weightlifting efforts at Body Pump but like I've said a million times before, I know it's necessary for my overall fitness. I'm hoping for at least a pound or 2 for my weigh in on Friday - the second to the last in the challenge! We're going out tomorrow night and I really need to compensate for that all week. If I'm careful, I can fit in a rosemary infused grapefruit margarita in a mason jar (my favorite drink on earth). Plus, grapefruit juice is healthy ;)

end of the week weigh in

2010-08-20T09:32:00.002-04:00

Week three of the challenge yields an (almost) 2 lb. loss for the week. That's a total of 10 since the challenge began!

I've still been working out 6 days a week at 6am and eating really well and it's paying off. Some days I wish for bigger numbers but the way I'm living right now is maintainable over the long run and that's the key to keeping it off this time.

It's been a super busy week with extra hours at my part time job but I still managed 3-5 miles a day of intervals. That makes me very proud.

Tomorrow is another Body Pump class and then Sunday is the day my husband and I do at least 3 miles with the dogs both running and walking. He's lost 10 pounds too!

I'm really in the groove right now. Long may it continue!

Have a great weekend everyone!

Monday mix tape

2010-08-16T13:47:00.005-04:00

I'm so proud to say I've completed another successful week and am fully prepared for this one that has just begun. I think the motivation I've been blessed with has been coming from being truly honest with myself and listening to my body. I'm feeling GREAT!

Friday night we went out with a friend to a bar that has amazing food of both the healthy and unhealthy varieties. I could have eaten everything but decided to start with munching on steamed edamame because I wasn't sure I had eaten enough vegetables that day. What a great way to fill up a little before ordering! After that, I was completely satisfied by one little chicken parmesean slider (about 3 bites worth) and a caprese salad with local tomatoes. Yes I had 2 beers but had planned on that ALL week! For a brief moment I wanted to stop at Dairy Queen but my husband reminded me we had 4o calorie fudge bars at home.

Saturday I was up and at my Body Pump class by 9:15. I did much better this week than last (which was my first time in 10 years) At least this week I didn't have to come home and take a nap! My soreness only lasted a day or 2 so I will probably up my weights just a tiny bit on the legs next week. My arms were burning just fine though! I have such a long way to go before I'm able to plow through it like I did 10 years ago but I'm really trying hard not to focus on that. Sometimes the realization of starting over hits me like a ton of bricks.

Saturday night we had shrimp and chicken fajitas that I made and brought them to the neighbors to pair with margaritas they had made. I had a few too many chips and and maybe an extra margarita but I felt it was a success for an "outing". Normally we would have gone out for mexican and it would NOT have been lovingly prepared with all healthy ingredients! Even the margaritas were nothing but fresh lime and tequila with no sugary mix.

Sunday morning my husband and I took the dogs out for a 3 miler. I wasn't planning on running but I (being honest with myself again) reminded myself that I was going to be doing a half marathon and that running outside at least some of the time is a necessary part of training. I decided to run on the downhills only but still managed about a mile! My husband usually runs ahead of me because I'm so slow but there's nothing like running toward his smiling face while he's cheering me on...even though I'm sure it's not the prettiest sight in the world. He says it's beautiful to see me running but all I can think about is all the jiggling that's going on - not that I would ever let that stop me. I'm hoping to look back fondly at these times when I'm crossing the finish line in March!

Shortly after that I got to meet Tammy at the farmers market and had a BLAST. She is so sweet and funny...one of those people I feel like I've known forever. I had a huge salad with a piece of homemade pita bread and only 1 bite of the pineapple croissants as we passed the bread sampling table. I loaded up with healthy fruit and veggies for the week and even with a pound of tilapia and rotisserie chicken, spent only $33. Fish is being made tonight with mango salsa, roasted brussels sprouts and their corn on the cob which is the best I've ever had. 2 ears of corn were 30 cents!

Sunday night was quiet and relaxing but I was still exhausted when I got up this morning. I could barely stay awake and was debating taking a day off after 6 in a row. My husband said I should listen to my body and do what I thought was best. My body was just saying I was sleepy but not sore really so I went. It wasn't the best workout and I felt like I was all over the place but I did the first day of week 3 of couch to 5k which is 9 minutes of running. I did 45 minutes total on the treadmill and then just threw in the towel. I hear the body pump instructor say it's better to do less than do more with bad form and that's what my problem was this morning. I just didn't have the energy to stand up tall and engage my core. I think some days are just going to be like that. Mondays especially.

That brings me to my question for y'all after this ridiculous long post about not a lot.

How do you handle "days off" from exercise?

I know from previous experience that I need to do 6 days a week but when I take a day off it seems to make me more tired. It's almost like if I don't have that exercise I just can't get going or I feel guilty about it. I know my body needs a break but I thought maybe something like yoga, a leisurely walk or a swim would be good for that seventh day. Or maybe I just take Mondays of altogether and quit obsessing about it. I would love to some thoughts on rest!

Here's to another great week ahead. I'm hoping the scale decides to reward me for some good behavior this week for the challenge now that Tom is almost gone :)

Not that I’m checking out your stats...

2010-08-12T11:24:00.001-04:00

I realized yesterday during a horrible afternoon bout with cramps that it was that fun time of the month again but at least it explained my cravings, hunger, and general irritability. Instead of curling up in a fetal position on the sofa I figured a walk with the husband and dogs would make me feel better. It was 105 heat index AND garbage day but there were parts of it that were enjoyable. Like running the length of the park without stopping! I know it’s a hell of a long way from a half marathon but It’s a big start.

I got up at 5:30 this morning still in a relatively foul mood despite the fact that I had a dream I was making out with Cristiano Ronaldo (superstar soccer player for those who don’t know) in a convenience store. At the gym by 6:15 I did a half an hour of C25K intervals. About halfway through, “the incredible stinking woman”, as I’ve now named her, showed up and got on a treadmill 4 down from me. I smelled her before I saw her. Even from that distance. I had to chuckle as a guy got off the one next to her and moved but the whole thing just added to the foulness of my mood.

All along I had been glancing over at the guy next to me who had been running the entire time - at 7.5 miles an hour - burning more than 500 calories. I try not to look at what anyone else is doing because I’m only in competition with myself but that was impressive!! Just as we both slowed down to a walk at the end of the first 30 minutes he gave me a thumbs up so I took out one of my earbuds and he said “interval training is the best thing you can do.” I had a HUGE smile on my face as we both started up again for another 30 minutes. Of course he ran ANOTHER 30 minutes at 7.5 miles an hour and burned another 500+ calories but I did walking incline intervals with an extra spring in my step. Thanks dude. You probably have no idea how much you encouraged me today :)

Dodging a Bullet

2010-08-10T11:17:00.002-04:00

Yesterday was a bit of a struggle for me but luckily being back to blogging regularly has made me so much more self-aware.

I had taken day off from the gym after 7 days in a row and I never seemed to be able to get going for the day without it. Later in the afternoon my business partner and I had to deal with a huge mess regarding a friend we thought we could rely on as another partner. I almost had an anxiety attack so I took half a xanax which didn't help my energy level.

I was really hurt and disappointed and all I wanted to do was eat. That's how quickly I found myself retreating to my old thoughts. I had already eaten a huge salad for lunch so I had an apple and Laughing Cow. Then a hundred calorie pack (luckily, only one). Then all I could think about was a cheeseburger from Five Guys. I wanted to be stuffed full and go to bed early. Even though we had already planned on having some whole wheat pasta with sauce that was already made and defrosting, I just couldn't bare the thought of it. The dogs were desperate for an "outing" so we decided to go to Moe's and pick up something that would satisfy my need for comfort without breaking the calorie bank. (a Joey Junior has only 383 calories without cheese)

It was delicious of course and fulfilled a need but I feel like that need to eat for comfort is never going to leave me. The important thing now I suppose is my awareness of it and working around it. Don't get me wrong. I know I can work the things I love into my meal plans but this really showed me how working out first thing in the morning sets the tone for my WHOLE day. Even my only day off, I need to move a little to get my head on straight.

I was still a little blah and tired this morning but I got up, laced up my shoes, and drove my husband to the train. In that short trip his encouragement turned my crap attitude around and by 7:15 am I had done AN HOUR on the treadmill. 30 minutes of that was couch to 5k then another half hour of incline walking. I feel like yesterday never happened and I'm back to my motivated self. If I'm going to do this half marathon, there is no room for setbacks.

As I was getting dressed for my part time job, I realized I didn't really have any summer pants that fit anymore. I'm hoping there's something in the archives to get me through this summer without having to buy anything new. Buh-bye to the size 20 somethings. The teens are back! I WILL remember this feeling next time I face a challenge.

Recovery

2010-08-08T12:27:00.002-04:00

Wow what a week this has been!

Not only did I have an 8 pound loss, today is the 7th day in a row I was in a gym.

Yesterday I survived my first Body Pump class. It was very intimidating because it was at a different Y and I hadn't done it in 10 years but I sucked it up and went. There were several people waiting to get in the room and I sat down next to a really cute skinny girl with an AMAZING butt. I wasn't going to talk to anyone and then I noticed she had a tattoo so I thought she might be "cool". (Don't you love the profiling going on in my head?) I asked her if she came to this class often and I realized right away she was a totally sweet girl. I was able to get the low down on which classes were the most crowded, best instructors etc. I was so thankful for her and I look forward to seeing her next week. I took it really easy on the weight but was already feeling it during the warm up which worried me until I realized everyone else was too! I was truly exhausted when I got home and took a nap which is something I rarely do.

Today was my official rest day but I woke up really sore and quickly realized if I didn't do some moving it was going to get much worse. I couldn't lift my coffee cup to my mouth! There was a very rare breeze blowing this morning so we took the dogs out and just kept going and going. Before we knew it we had done almost 3 miles, including some running. I was absolutely drenched with sweat but I embraced it and had a great time. Then I had the brilliant idea of throwing on my suit and going to jump in the pool at the Y. I did just a few easy laps, some major stretching and ended with a dip in the hot tub. It was a perfect morning with very few people there and totally relaxing.

As I sit here and type this I'm finding it difficult to move my arms. Standing up is even more difficult but at the same time it's the greatest feeling. I know I'm on my way to losing this 100 pounds for the last time.

So, all my blog friends, how do you recover from killer workouts? Any advice would be appreciated because I anticipate feeling like this a lot throughout the rest of my journey. Hope y'all had a great weekend!!

week one challenge

2010-08-06T08:23:00.004-04:00

GREAT DAY!!!!

I'm calling this one an 8 pound loss this week. Maybe more like 7.6 but whatev.

To add to my excitement, I get to finally meet Crys today. I will try to take a picture but the farmers market we are going to has huge signs everywhere that you will be kicked out if you're caught taking pictures.

I've been exercising every day (sweating like never before), eating more veggies and drinking my water. I earned every pound of the loss this week. Of course I'm not expecting this every week but it sure is a nice way to start the challenge!

Tomorrow is my first Body Pump class which makes 6 days in a row so I'm taking Sunday OFF except for a dog walk of course.

Have a great weekend everyone! I made a promise to at least do one post over the weekend so I will be checking in!!

Good Morning Moon

2010-08-05T11:04:00.001-04:00

I woke up this morning at 5:30 staring at the moon out the window and thinking how crazy it is to be up before the sun. I fought the morning workout thing most of my life and I have to admit that after a month now, I’m getting into the swing of it. There’s an entire world out there I didn’t know existed - a world of healthy people starting the day off right.

On the days my husband goes to his gym at the hospital, I drop him off at the train by 6. He just started the morning routine since his afternoon boot camps at work ended and I think he’s struggling a bit to get used to it. Our routine before consisted of sitting around drinking coffee, watching Today, and easing into the morning. Now it’s rushing to dress, eat something and head out the door. Luckily I have that time AFTER the gym but he has to go straight to work.

As we were driving and observing all the people out walking and running in the neighborhood, it kind of hit me like a ton of bricks. I said to my husband “if we want to be like these people, we have to live like them.” I thought that was awfully profound of me at 6am :) I think my husband was a bit surprised as well. I don’t know why but things are finally starting to make sense.

I almost had to stop my workout this morning because of a horrible, stinky woman next to me on the treadmill. I could tell right away when she got on it was bad but then she started moving her arms all around and grooving to her music while running. That was completely intolerable. There were no other treadmills available and so I just put my towel over my mouth and nose. Not even caring at all if she was offended. As soon as I saw another open up I slammed on the stop button and switched. I really hope she got the hint. I did manage a full 30 minutes C25k workout and then added on another 20 minutes of fast walking. Combine that with a 20 minute dog walk in 105 degree heat later and you’ve got 70 minutes of cardio. And I haven’t missed a day this week.<

Tammy’s challenge has been extremely motivating and I’m really glad I finally took one on. I’m going to weigh in on Saturday so stay tuned. I believe we’re going to have some good results!

I can't believe I'm saying this out loud

2010-08-04T10:16:00.002-04:00

This past March, I sat on my living room sofa and watched the news coverage of the ING marathon in Atlanta. I knew people who were participating and I wanted more than anything to be out there with them on that gorgeous day. It seems to be the only running event in Atlanta that takes place at a reasonable time of year - when it's not blistering hot. Also, the route is through the neighborhoods on my side of town.

Since then I've thought about doing the half but it was just a thought. Something I wasn't sure I could do or wanted to commit to. I've done the 3-day three times but this is different. Especially with the hills. In fact, when I think about it I have this feeling in the pit of my stomach like I get at the end of day one on the 3-Day. The "what the hell have I gotten myself into" and the "I don't think I can do this" feeling.

My friend Crys also shares my desire to become a runner and I'm hoping that the 2 of us can accomplish this enormous goal together. There's plenty of time to train but I had to put it out there as a real goal. Now. So I take it seriously.

Dear lord what have I done.

My Hero

2010-08-03T10:04:00.004-04:00

Dear Al Roker,

I watched the video of you crossing the finish line of the Rock n Roll Chicago half marathon while I was on the treadmill this morning. I was practically in tears I was so proud of you.

A few months ago when you spoke for the first time on the Today show about your amazing weight loss, there was a video clip of you running at 3:30 am and it's something I've never forgotten. Just when I think I can't get up and work out, I think about you, plowing through it every day, hours earlier than me. In fact, you're already on the weather channel by that time.

You joked about how you should have "worn a bra" but you are still my hero. Man boobs and all. I just hope you know how much of an inspiration you are to me and everyone struggling with weight issues.

I know your journey hasn't been easy but I hope that inspiring the rest of us makes it a little easier. I dream of doing the ING half marathon in March. Now I know I can do it.

With thanks and admiration,
Tina
p.s. Not a stalker :)

my first challenge

2010-08-02T10:29:00.003-04:00

Tammy my fellow Atlanta blogger is having a challenge! You can read all about it over at her blog.

I've never done a challenge before but I need a little motivation and some short term goals so I figure it can't hurt.

The only thing that did hurt is posting this today. I broke into the 230's last month and really want to get back on the downward trend. Lets see how low we can go by the end of the month!

I got a good start today. I was up at 5:45am after a restless night due to dogs and storms. I did 45 minutes on the treadmill and was soaked through with sweat. Since getting proper shoes, my hip has been better and I'm going to try running again tomorrow. I also added 20 minutes of stretching along with abs and push-ups on ball.

All healthy meals are planned for the week and the house has been cleared of Oreos.

Here's to a happy, healthy week! Join in the challenge if you can!

me week

2010-08-01T12:04:00.002-04:00

Is anyone else amazed that it's August already? I'm trying to clear my head of negative thoughts about how much I'd hoped to accomplish by this time and focus on what I have done. I think I've survived the loss of my job and have come out okay on the other side. It's still a struggle financially and I have to work so much harder to pay the bills but I actually had a few bucks left over this month and treated myself to a "me week". I got my hair cut and colored, I went shopping, I got some new makeup, cleaned and organized my bathroom and closet and stocked up on some good food for the week ahead. I thought I would finish it off with a weekend blog post which always makes me feel great. After this it's back to work :)

I've been keeping up my exercise during the hottest summer we've ever had but weekend eating has been negating all my efforts during the week. I feel strong but flabby which is a sign that it's time to add some weights into the routine. My plan for this week is to do my usual cardio and give myself some time after for some body weight exercises. Saturday, the other Y (that I haven't been to yet) has a Body Pump class at 9:30 am that has a 15 minute setup class for first timers. I haven't been in years and that helps ease my fears a little. When I lost 100 pounds the last time, I went 3 days a week religiously and it was my favorite way to workout. I'm hoping to see some results from this plan.

Okay now I'm totally procrastinating and need to work in hopes of one day going on vacation again. Here's to the week ahead!

this is getting serious

2010-07-22T14:03:00.003-04:00

Today was a big deal for me. I'm still having weird hip issues so I decided to finally get fitted for some real running shoes.

I did this once before for the 3-day but it was just someone watching me walk and then me trying on shoes. Today's experience was a high-tech analysis of my run which involved computers and video and treadmills etc.

I was terrified to go in this place. I was sure it would be full of snooty marathon runners but it was totally the opposite. I felt comfortable the second I walked in and they seemed thrilled to have yet another member of their running cult :) I also got some socks so we'll see if this is the magical shoe/sock combo I've been desperate to find for years. I'm almost looking forward to getting out of bed at 5:45 tomorrow to put them on.

Yet another fear conquered and a great excuse to keep it up. My next goal is to run to this place from my house and partake of their "free water for runners" :)