Tuesday, February 22, 2011

when your body lets you down

No one ever told me that when you hit your forties, it all starts to go downhill.

I've considered myself lucky for so long that I haven't had any issues related to my years of obesity, a history of smoking, drinking etc. I was a seriously healthy person.

My recent asthma diagnosis was only part of it and yesterday I got a call saying they looked at my pulmonary function tests and my echocardiogram together and are seeing signs of mild pulmonary hypertension and signs of mild emphysema. That has me a little more freaked out that just plain ol' asthma.

I'm seeing a pulmonologist in early March and I'll know more but in the mean time, no half marathon. I can exercise but nothing 'extreme' like 13 miles. For now. I'm hoping to be able to downgrade to the 5k which I'm allowed to do so at least I won't lose my money and will have something to look forward to.

Maybe this is why I'm struggling to get past a 5k. Maybe I will be able to do more when this is diagnosed and treated?

For the first time (or maybe I'm just now realizing this) my body is holding me back from what I want to do. I don't just want to be skinny. I WANT to be a runner. I WANT to be that active, fit person who knows no limits. I have the energy and the mindset to do all of it and the body just can't.

My trainer said last night that she thinks I'm at a real turning point and positive place in my life where I can do some great things for myself. I'm not taking that lightly. I've got the tools in place. Between my yoga instructors and my trainer, I have an army of hot chicks working on me. I can be one of them if I take this seriously and keep working my ass off to pay for it all.

11 comments:

  1. I hope everything turns out okay. Keep us posted!

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  2. Thinking of you today. Dammit all about the new medical diagnosis. xoxoxo

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  3. Maybe you should stop going to the doctor, dude. lol..totally kidding. I just know you're tired of the multiple diagnoses! You have everything you need within you to accomplish what youw want to. If you need meds, take them. If you have to accomplish the goals at a slower pace, that's fine, too. But you'll get where you want to go...I totally, completely, 100% believe in YOU. :)

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  4. Well that sucks. I hope the next doctor visit will provide some better news. Maybe you and I should start a "Half Marathon Dropout" group, lol. The good news is that you do have the will and the drive to do whatever it takes to get yourself fit and healthy, and that will carry you a long way. Take care, Tina.

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  5. That's some pretty upsetting news I'm sure, so sorry! But you are doing things to make yourself healthier, just keep those things up and try not to focus on the negative. You can deal with it when it comes.

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  6. Yes, your body starts a downhill slide once you hit your physical peak, but the thing to understand is that it's not something you can't control. Think of it like snow skiing; you can still go downhill, but stay in control and enjoy the ride!

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  7. I can totally relate. Things are breaking down in this body too. Yuck!

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  8. You can totally do this, Girl!!! If it's baby steps we have to take, then that's what you have to do. Your body is telling you something. Maybe no Half Marathon right now...but hopefully once the doctors get the diagnosis right...and treat you accordingly...you can work up to that again (if that's what you want to do!). All of us on here totally support you...along with those other rockin' Hot Chicks!!!

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  9. I love what Jack said! It sucks what you're going through, but you have a fabulous attitude and I have faith in you!

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  10. Hang in there!! Yeah, you don't know 40 until you hit 40!!!!

    Hormones, bioidentical ones, are awesome though!!!!
    Glad I quit eating s**t in my thirties, as I can't even imagine trying to age & stay thin eating what I did in my twenties.

    Maybe yoga would be okay for you? (If the running thing doesn't happen)

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  11. Hang in there!! Yeah, you don't know 40 until you hit 40!!!!

    Hormones, bioidentical ones, are awesome though!!!!
    Glad I quit eating s**t in my thirties, as I can't even imagine trying to age & stay thin eating what I did in my twenties.

    Maybe yoga would be okay for you? (If the running thing doesn't happen)

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