Weekly weigh-in

I lost 3 pounds this week!!!!! Here's how...

That's 5 pounds in 2 weeks. Every single one earned the hard way.

Tomorrow morning at dawn, I'm ditching my running group to run the course of my upcoming 10k. All this month, the Atlanta Track Club has a water station for people training and I think I will feel a lot less anxious once I've done it once. I'm going to run as much as I can and walk up "cardiac hill". The hospital where my husband works is at the top which is part of the reason for the nickname. I can always just go straight to the ER at the top of the hill :)

Have a great weekend everyone! Thanks for all the love.

Gains vs. Losses

What an AMAZING morning I have had. Full of energy AND creativity (which is handy when you're a creative professional)!

Yesterday was pretty sucky. I had to go out to the store to buy the stuff to treat a girly issue which is worse than the actual girlie issue itself. Because of said issue, I was cranky. And I wanted FOOD! I fought with myself before going to the store, on the way to the store, at the store, and after the store.

Before the store, I knew I needed to eat or there would be damage done. Of course we have nothing but healthy food so I chose the least healthy of the healthy food - that being the last veggie corn dog in the house. Victory number one.

On the way to the store I'm full from that so I felt I could at least make it to the store safely. There is no Chick-Fil-A in the 'hood which is the only "fast" food I ever eat. There is however a Sonic which I've been known to frequent.Victory number two.

At the store (the most ghetto Walmart of all time) anxiety kicks in to full gear. I honestly don't know why I go there other than dog food is half the price. I think sanity is worth a few extra bucks and will be going to Target from now on. The temptation is EVERYWHERE but I avoid it all and GTFO. There is nothing in my cart but girlie medicine, dog food and a new workout tank. Victory number 3.

Of course the idiot cashier won't take my coupon because some © symbol is missing?!?!!? but I'm not getting the manager to save $3 on the girlie medicine. Now I'm pissed. I storm out, throw everything in my car and am determined I'm going to eat something delicious. Then it hits me. Am I going to destroy my good week because some idiot cashier pissed me off? I get pissed of at someone just about every day I'm letting them WIN! Humongous, GIGANTIC victory number four.

I did not work out yesterday but I was determined to turn that around. This morning, I got up at 6 instead of laying laying in bed moaning about my girlie parts, and I ran and ran and ran some more until I was absolutely dripping wet. Almost 3 miles. The weather was great, I felt great. It's been a while.

Imagine my surprise when I synced my iPod to upload it to the Nike+ site

I've been doing nothing but complaining about not losing weight but look at this progress??? I have shaved 2 minutes of my mile. That's like one minute per foot of my two foot long legs! :)

Weigh in tomorrow so stay tuned!!!!

Food Rut

I've been blogging long enough to know that this seems to happen to all of us so I thought I'd reach out and get some new ideas.

Breakfast:
My Fage breakfast has been making me feel ill - either I'm sick of it or developing a dairy intolerance. Either way, I need a new breakfast. I'm making some egg beaters breakfast muffins later today but eating the same thing every day is dangerous for me. I need to mix it up. On yoga days I stick to a spinach smoothie but on my heavier workout days I need a bigger breakfast.

Lunch:
This has become my most difficult meal since I work 9-2. Either I need to bring need my lunch or bring snacks to tide me over until lunch when I get home. Bringing lunch requires preparation and inspiration. I have not been prepared nor inspired.

Dinner:
This meal is a little easier especially when planned for the week. Lately we're doing no carbs for dinner. Just protein and veggies which is never exciting to me. It helps that it's summer and veggies are plentiful - some even home grown! Beans are nice and filling so I look for ways to work them in.

What are y'all eating that's interesting?

Finally, a little progress!

The scale FINALLY moved in the right direction. I lost 2 pounds this week which is exactly what I was hoping for. I didn't even suffer! I cut back on my carbs but still had pizza - just half the amount I normally would. I even ran again yesterday though it was a bad one. I was out of breath and slow even though I was on a treadmill in a nice, cool gym but that's what happens when you skip days. I realized I was being a little hard on myself because it was almost 2 miles and that's a pretty decent distance for a busy Thursday.

I'm blogging about my weight loss today in the hopes it will carry me through the weekend and keep me honest with my eating. I can easily put that back on over the weekend but I'm challenging myself to keep it off and start a new, healthy week 2 pounds lighter. I have 4:30 Bikram this afternoon which is always a great start to the weekend. I can also keep myself busy with some exercise, some gardening and lots of food prep for the week ahead.

Happy Friday everyone!

Portions and positivity

That is the mantra for the week.

We were away for a crazy weekend of debauchery in Savannah, then Jacksonville to see USA vs. Scotland in soccer so I got my fill of eating and drinking for a while. I'm ready to buckle down again since my big 10k is a month away.

My husband is Scottish and was supporting Scotland. I was cheering for the U.S. (who won by the way!) though the Scottish fans are a lot more fun!

Portions
I realized that while I haven't been eating badly, I've been eating a LOT and it's time to gain control of my portions and be REALLY honest about it. It's one of those things that's not really all that hard but can get really out of control if you stop paying attention.

Positivity
I've been really struggling with this lately. I'm one of the most optimistic people in the world and lately, it's been non-existent. I hate what I see in the mirror. I hate that I have nothing to wear and it's summertime. We went out to an art show a few weeks ago and I was wearing a tshirt and yoga pants because it's all I had that fit right. We picked up some friends on the way and they were all dressed up in cute tank tops and jeans. I felt so dumpy I cried. Luckily I had sunglasses on and I don't think anyone noticed. It makes me sad that I feel this way yet it's still not enough for me to give it my absolute best effort?!?!?

I went back to yoga last night after not going for a few weeks and I already feel so much more positive. I was talking to one of the few men that are regulars about how I hadn't been in a while and neither had he. Just before we started, I was stretching out and he came over, kneeled down at my mat and said "it only takes one class and you'll be back on track." He must have seen the fear on my face as I realized how stiff I was. That left me with a huge smile on my face through the whole class. At the end, my instructor reminded us to be thankful and proud because most people you pulled of the street would not be able to do a 90 minute hot yoga class. She's totally right and that's what's keeping me going right now.

This post is kind of a boring brain dump but I think it's important for me to acknowledge the not-so-good times as well as the good times!

Deflated

I'm in this hateful pattern right now of making one step forward and falling 3 steps back. I was ALL geared up for my 5k on Saturday even though I didn't work out for most of the week due to a ridiculous work schedule. I woke up at 1am with a just about the worst headache I've ever had and then vomited for the next 8 hours. As my alarm went off, there I was, sitting on the bathroom floor looking at my running clothes all laid out. There was absolutely no way I was going.

This has happened to me about 5 times in the last year and a half and after doing some research, I can only attribute it to dehydration maybe combined with stress? I've never had migraines before but I'm sure this is what they feel like. I'll guess I'll go see the doctor about it at this point along with all my other ailments. In the meantime, I'm drinking all the smart water and Powerade zero I can handle.

Tuesday, I didn't go to yoga because I looked like crap. What kind of excuse is that? Definitely not like me at all. I blamed that one on hormones but again, no excuse.

I'm being challenged and losing which makes me tired of fighting.

Am I meant to be the athlete I want to be? Maybe it's just not in the cards for some of us.

Am I stuck with my 200+ pounds body and that's just the way it is?
I don't know if I can accept that but I'm sure tired of dragging and extra person around with me. No wonder running is hard.

I'm not giving up. I don't have a choice if I want to live a long life with my amazing husband but it sure would be nice if it could be just a little easier.

Monday Mix Tape

10K training week 3:
After stressing about it from Thursday onward, I woke up on Saturday at 6am to pouring rain and lightning and I have to say I was a little relieved! I was ridiculously sore from the weeks workouts and it felt great to get a little extra sleep. I still made myself go to the gym and do a 5k on the treadmill which seemed so easy after training outside for the last few weeks!
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Aches, pains and whatnot:
Now that my foot is fixed, my left shoulder has decided to act up. It could be arthritis, tendonitis, or a rotator cuff injury. I won't know until I see a specialist. I guess I'll just go back to the orthopedic practice and ask for the shoulder specialist since the foot specialist cured me. They should have a "frequent shopper" program where the 10th visit is free or something :)

As if I wasn't feeling old enough, night sweats have started. (heavy sigh)
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Things that make you think:
I'm so proud of my friend Crys who just had a gastric bypass and is home recovering. This has been a huge step for her and something I've thought about a million times and am WAY too afraid to take on.
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Weight loss?
I don't even know what that means anymore it's been so long. It's so frustrating working out 5-6 days a week and seeing no progress on the scale. It's time to do something drastic but I'm not sure what that is yet. Vegan diet? Endocrinologist? Nutritionist? Juice Fast?
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The week ahead
I have a full week of workouts planned and a 5K on Saturday. I'm not even nervous about it (yet!!)

Have a great week everyone!