Monday, June 15, 2009

Peer Pressure

Once again, I cannot believe it's Monday again already. Waking up to face this week was not easy. I'm still 20 grand less motivated and I've managed to gain 7 pounds in 10 days. Is that even physically possible while doing week one of C25K?

I've been giving into peer pressure for the first time in my life at almost 40. Not sure why other than the fact that I have someone else to consider now and my decisions affect my husband too.

My husbands best friend and his wife have plenty of money and constantly want to go out and eat and drink. We have both told them time and time again that we can't afford it right now - the money and the calories - but they continue to invite us out every weekend. After a while I feel bad always saying no. I want my husband to see his best friend and I don't want to never have any fun.

The obvious answer is to go along and not drink and eat and enjoy the people you are with but what if you DON'T enjoy the people you are with and some tequila makes it more tolerable? Don't get me wrong, I love my husbands friend but his wife has given up her corporate job to live her dream of being a photographer and now she's making a ton of money without even being good at it. I cannot relate to any of that right now and shudder every time she talks about being able to do whatever she wants. Am I jealous? yes.

Another wonderful solution would be to just send my husband out with his best friend. Simple. Except for the wife of the friend won't let the husband out of her sight so I once again feel bad sending my husband out on his own to be with the both of them. Why are women like that? I'm so happy to see my husband go out and have fun while I have some quality HGTV time.

Yesterday I gave in. We spent $125 we didn't have, and I woke up feeling like crap and crying over the scale. Totally not worth it. Add in the not wanting to go to work (which is awful right now) and I'm a bit of a mess.

Sorry for the long and oh so negative post but I feel better for getting that out. I'm waiting for some grand revelation on the career front but we are in such a holding pattern in the industry right now I don't think there will be an answer for a while. In the meantime, I'm going to finish my first week of C25K which hurts so much but feels so good at the same time. I have good food planned and am not drinking a drop of alcohol for the next 10 days. That should help, at least with the scale woes.

I hope everyone had a great weekend. Thanks for all the suggestions on the headphones and running. I never thought about putting the cord in my shirt and that works so well! Y'all are such a big help and now I can wait until the price on the wireless ones come down. I appreciate the support SO much. (((Group hug))) Here's to a good week ahead! *raising glass of water, not tequila*


  1. I can totally relate to your situation with the friends/job/etc. It's really difficult, and I hurt right there with you.

    Sending you positive thoughts and motivation for this coming week. :)

  2. Boy oh boy are we in the same boat! However I fell asshole over applecart off the wagon at a 5 yr old's dance recital weekend!! Same crappy result, without the pleasure of a little booze. :0

    Sorry you're having a rough go of it, but I know you'll weather this storm, too. I'm kinda struggling right now as well, but I remain committed even tho' sometimes it doesn't feel like it.

    Remember, you blogosphere friends are behind you 100%, and if we can do anything, we will.

    I'm Channelling good vibes for you right now. Ohmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

  3. That is so rough! It sucks when negative things compound and magnify what is already bumming you out.

    I hope you can work through it with running and writing. No matter what you'll figure it out!

  4. I totally can relate to friends that want to go out all the time and not wanting to spend the resourses to do it. We usually just bite the bullet once in a while or ask people over for a bbq.

    Hopefully the wife will get over herself soon. Really, how much bragging can you take?

    Congrats on the C25k... I'm going to get back and redo week one this week.

    sorry you're having a bad start to the day. make some good choices and your mojo will be back before you know it. hugs...

  5. I've started "just saying no" to invitations to go out. I have a dozen excuses in my pocket at any time... dog's throwing up...meeting an electrician at the house... expecting phone call from the Pope. It's hard, but you gotta look out for yourself sometimes.

  6. Oh I feel your pain. I just looked at my calender for this week and I'm supposed to be out every night, so thank you for reminding me that I need to take action! I'm cutting 2 events by inviting those people to a party on Sat, and drinking diet coke at all but 1 events.

    As for your situation, can you meet them out for a movie and coffee? Or for the free night at the art museum? The other thing I do a lot to cut down on calories and cash is BYOB sushi places - not sure if you like sushi or if Atlanta has a lot of BYOB places, but if you do a search on metromix or citysearch it should tell you. Then I eat just the "pure" sushi (i.e. no tempura, mayo stuff) and miso soup, while everyone else gets all the higher calorie stuff.

    Hang in there!!

  7. How difficult for you - I would invite them to my house and serve extremely low fat food (without telling them of course).

    Hope you feel better soon and way to go on doing so well with the C25K programme!

  8. I agree with Fat[free]me - invite them over, this way you have control. Or just say no. If they can't take the hint that it's too expensive for you guys, then don't feel bad about turning them down. It's not worth the hurting bank account (and pounds).

  9. I agree - invite them over. Chances are Wifey won't be able to get her head through the door (without benefit of some serious Vaseline) and so it'll work out just fine - you husband and best friend having fun together.

    I have had very similar instances with hubby's best friend & wife - as recent as this weekend. My jaw is just now unclenching. There is not enough booze in this world to make that woman palatable. Hope you're feeling better.

  10. We scared off any party friends long ago...start talking about gardening a lot. They will quit calling very soon! :-)

    I'm with V....Ohmmmmmmmmm.

  11. I know, money is really tight for me right now too. I hate it when some people just fall into money. Why can't it ever be me. Jealous much...yes I am that too.

    Glad you got that off your chest. You are in a pickle for sure. I don't know what I would do with the BF and his wife. I'll be waiting to see what you do.

    Don't let the scale get you down as well.....easier said then done. You'll get your mojo back!

  12. That woman sounds toxic for you right now. I say let your husband go without you (maybe encourage him to meet said friend for lunch, or for an activity the wife doesn't enjoy????). Don't let this person sabotage you!!!

    I'm totally broke right now as well, so I have to be super careful about my social engagements. It's tough, but this too shall pass. Wish you lived closer - I'd be up for cheap low-fat friend dates! :)

  13. This is tough. I can relate as well. A friend of mine doesn't hesitate to spend upwards of $200 for a concert. She invites me. I decline because I don't have $200+ to spend on a concert. When I was 20 something?? HELL YES, I would, but I didn't have real responsibilities then. Maybe your husband could meet his best friend (alone) and you could tell wifey there's a photo competition in Alabama.